Jen and Brad have been an item for 13 years now. “We met in a laundromat,” she says. “Very glam. And he had no idea how to properly wash his shorts.”
Since then they married, had a kid (now six), bought a semi in the burbs and both forged careers. She’s in HR. He’s a software engineer at a gaming shop. Household income is $180,000. She has a DC pension (6% shared RRSP contributions). He has none. 2020 Honda CRV. No dog. Yet. “On the list,” Brad says.
Now in their mid-30s, it’s get-serious-time about personal finances and the future. So we talked.
As it turned out, they have a $430,000 mortgage and about two hundred in house equity. Liquid assets total $220,000 in TFSAs, RRSPs and an RESP for the squirt. For their ages, given today’s financial reality, not so bad. But the path to an early retirement – say in 20 years – will be a tough one. Family expenses will be higher. Savings will be pressed. The mortgage will renew at a far higher rate. And most of what they’ve got invested now is in bank mutual funds with bloodsucking MERs.
But that’s not the biggest challenge. They don’t trust each other.
At least, that’s what I asked – after I heard both say they have “no idea” what the other person has for investments; that they keep their money in separate banks; have no joint account; and (of course) no plan. “We never got around to it,” Jen says. “We never talked about it. Besides when my mom died and I got a small inheritance and my lawyer told me to never mingle it with Brad’s money.” It was a female lawyer. I asked.
The two of them contribute money for household expenses, but spend as they see fit from their own accounts. Consequently, there’s no budget. No communal savings plan. After all my irritating questions were answered, it was clear this you-vs-me approach to finances also meant they didn’t have a will or POAs. About all they actually share in life is a mortgage to the green bank, and a six-year-old.
But that’s not the reality. They love each other. Nobody taught them that getting hitched means two individuals suddenly become one economic unit. If they don’t pull together, share every detail and financial intimacy, life gets more uncertain. Now they have zero coordination between their investment accounts, leading to overlap, duplication and imbalances. It’s impossible to craft a joint retirement strategy, for example, to control spending, save enough, cut banking fees, deal with looming inflationary hits (like the mortgage renewal) or even know if the future is secure.
So, I said, if you share your lives together, why not share your money?
Herewith, some guidelines from the GreaterFool Intimate Financial Marital Toolkit. ®
First, talk about this stuff early. During dating and smooching maybe. Certainly before moving in together or marriage. Once you share a roof for a while, you’re a couple. That means legal and financial obligations to each other should the relationship end, for example.
More salient is how to best build a life together. In harmony. Transparency. The leading cause of divorce, separation and throwing pots at each other is (of course) money. Keeping separate bank accounts, not discussing spending or pooling savings is a great way to create conflict, resentment or mistrust. Besides, it prevents you from effectively moving ahead to achieve joint goals. Like real estate. Or financing your kids. Affording vacations. Or that essential new Harley.
Don’t use separate banks for your TFSAs or other accounts. Coordinating assets will be a nightmare. Do not maintain separate savings accounts. Why are you hiding money from each other when it should be working for mutual benefit?
Have a joint non-registered investment account. This may allow for lower taxes since the returns can be split between both instead of landing in the hands of one. Also if one spouse croaks unexpectedly (happens) the other will have immediate, unfettered access to, and possession of, all the money in that account.
Consider a spousal loan. One can loan money to the other at a ridiculously low rate for investment purposes. No gains will be attributed back to the lender (unlike a gift, where attribution rules apply) and the interest paid annually is tax-deductible for the borrower.
Also be smart about income differentials. If one person earns more than the other, consider a spousal RRSP. That way the spouse making more still claims deductions but the other, less-taxed person owns the money (after three years) and can withdraw it at a lower rate. Also think about who pays what in a household. The higher-income spouse should pay the bills. The lower-income person should invest their income – since more of the gains will be retained. And ensure you make each other beneficiaries on RRSPs, successor holders on TFSAs and that the will’s up to date and lawyer-written.
Love is good. Love with trust is way better.
About the photo: “I have been enjoying your blog for about 12 years now,” writes Rob. “When we bought our retirement house in Mazatlan, we were immediately taken under the wing of Guapo – pictured guarding the door. He was the king of the street and everyone loved him. Guapo passed this summer while we were in Canada. I will miss my friend dearly this season.”
148 comments ↓
I rarely comment, but this advice really speaks to me. honestly I find it’s a product of planning to fail rather than planning to succeed… They have seen so much propaganda about the inevitable failure of monogamy that it becomes a self fulfilling prophecy. I know those of you here who have been in multiple marriages will disagree but we are bombarded by infidelity and all the media that we watch so it’s no wonder why young ones are timid about sharing things other than the bed.
Full disclosure: I am also a millennial… Not a boomer. An older one tho
Brennifer is doing pretty good!
Great post!
My wife and I make identical incomes and both with DB pensions.
I started a TFSA early and she never did. So, because my TFSA amount is large (or larger), we put money into it so as to benefit from compound interest.
All this with the understanding that the money within is for both of us (we share everything).
Is that the wrong way to go about it? Should she be starting to put money into a TFSA?
Is this one isolated situation or is this the new world
order. A marriage should be two people pooling their
assets and pulling together in the same direction.
There should be management by goals and objectives
with each having a clear view of each others total
investments etc. Thank GOD for your input Garth.
The financial advice makes sense Garth, but sadly society has greatly interfered with what a family is, here in Canada. When families break apart (which always happened, over time) there will be a multitude of leeches sucking a vast portion of the ex-couple’s assets. The process is protracted and very expensive. Thus, partners approach the partnership as a joint-venture, and attempt to protect themselves through various documents, and through secrecy. Again, leeches win (through double commissions, etc.). No win – except for the legislated leeches.
While the financial advice is excellent (as always) before mingling the finances I’d suggest making sure you & your squeeze are on the same page regarding how to handle financial matters. If one partner is a diligent saver while the other partner is an equally diligent spender, don’t expect financial harmony to occur. Be clear about what the goal(s) are & be prepared to be flexible. While it is important to be financially stable/secure, don’t make the mistake of being the richest guy or girl in the graveyard.
It is cheque time JT. I need to take the kids on a nice holiday (we deserve it), so send money. You always do. We are waiting.
#121 Ponzius Pilatus on 10.11.22 at 11:58 pm
#114 Old worn out boot
We have abandoned defenseless, traumatized, harmless, broken people to their addictions, and to the predators who roam freely amongst them.
—————————
So, what’s your solution?
********
Motivated, not mandatory, treatment.
Employers motivate drug-abusing workers into treatment all the time by giving them a choice between drugs or their paycheck.
Refuse treatment? No welfare for you. Just like employees who refuse treatment demanded by their employer get fired.
Meaningful consequences are powerful motivators.
Do unemployed people have different rights than employed people or are they less deserving of a life free from addiction? No, of course not.
Violent people, regardless of medical history, should not be allowed to predate on society. Lock’em up in either prison or forensic psych units, as directed by the courts.
You know, like we used to do before we all lost our minds and decided that dysfunctional people who willingly inject puddle water into themselves are fit to dictate terms to the rest of society .
#3 ‘Captain’ – absolutely your squeeze should open & fill a TFSA to the limit. Right now the rules allow everyone age 18+ to put $6K per annum into a tax free growth vehicle. It is nice your TFSA is growing, but why wouldn’t you take advantage of being able to put $12K per annum away for your futures instead of only $6K? $12K growing tax free is going to produce a lot more than $6K doing the same thing.
Furz will blow a gasket on this topic, Ponze. Watch!
Turner Investments Marriage Counseling
– Ask Dr. Garth
[Ann Landers has passed the baton, on]
—————-
Topic yesterday on Twitter about mortgage fraud, some guess it is rampant. Ron the Mortgage guy (sharp, candor) figures in about 5% of the cases only.
Then again he got all excited today at “Mortgage Fraud Caught on Camera” Friday at 8 pm on CBC-TV and CBCGem:
https://twitter.com/ronmortgageguy/status/1580245031016747009
TIP:
When Ron uses 3 down arrows in a Tweet, you know he’s really, really excited.
A pessimistic view on divorce:
Divorce lawyers need ‘churn’ and couples’ conflict to keep the money flowing…
Don’t have a lot of family assets? Quick divorce, pay up now. Move on to the next client.
Large family assets? Keep ’em at each other throats and drag this on for years and appeals… Billable hours up, new car for me, Mr. Lawyer.
Wife and I have been together since 1985. Always have had separate finances. Keep track of mortage payments and household / family expenses and split them 50 / 50.
Her vehicle , her money , same for me. I do all maintenence and repair no charge except parts. I also do all house repairs just split the materials cost. Hundreds upon hundreds of hours over the years, but I sure am not going to hire someone to do any of it.
Her money otherwise is her money, same for me.
Its been working for 35 years now. She has way more investments than I do. Higher income, and she spends less than I do on tools, hobby vehicles etc.
I get by as a retired person. She will have ample when she fully retires. We both are generally quite frugal people. Never really changed our spending habits much from when we were both struggling students.
If it isn’t broken why fix it ?
Mr. Trudeau thanks you both. – Garth
BC Real Estate board stated that sales in September were down 46% ….Wow
But prices are slightly higher…..Double Wow
Good article.
“Since then they married, had a kid (now six),”
When I read this, I had a double-take. So they had one child shortly after marriage, but six of them now. It wasn’t till later on, I realized there was only one child, who was now six years old.
Lots of kids do separate finances these days. Sounds like a pita to me. One chequing account where all cash lands and launches gives the best financial intel and convenience. When Ms IH and I got hitched, we both dumped our former banks, and got set up jointly at a new one.
“#4 cuke and tomato picker
Is this one isolated situation or is this the new world
order.”
Been like that since Women have made more or as much as men.
What about the stashing of JD bottles ’round the yard Smoking man style?
—–
I am a board certified Blog Dog with 10 years experience.
My fluoride-addled brain, spent from years of pricey re-education at some of Kanda’s largest Marxist-Leninist post secondary institutions, has left me unable to conceive of a paradigm outside of the Left/Right dichotomy.
Some other gurus would advise to definitely have a joint account, have joint goals, be open and 100% transparent with each other about spending, savings, income, investing, etc. but you should both have your own bank accounts, credit, pensions and savings as well.
Best of both worlds where you realize the benefits of sharing with your spouse, but also have your own world should the worst happen.
Both people should also know how to pay the monthly bills and access all the accounts. And having children with no will? What?! I hope they have life insurance.
RE: Trigger Rate Blog the other day.
Seems the carnage has already started.
Your usual “a friend who works at a big bank” Ref. but Nasma like Ron the Mortgage guy honest, sharp and candid:
https://twitter.com/nasmadotali/status/1580234450952421376
Enough of these events and the Cdn MSM will awaken from their usual slumber and spread it all over the place as click bait.
Of course, now a statistically insignificant observation but I have a feeling this snowball has just started rolling down from the peak of Mt. Everest.
#3 captain uppa
Compounding works the same in one account as it does in two. You should really set up another account so when you max the first one you can begin maxing the other.
Speaking from experience…my personal opinion is this…
If you make significantly more, or are on track to make significantly more money than a potential future live-in “partner”, obtain a cohabitation agreement prior to moving in together.
You can still structure finances openly as suggested, however you can level the playing field legally should the relationship end.
“Spousal support” awards are completely outrageous in Canada. Protect yourself, there is no downside. Find a new partner if the other half refuses.
Advice I was told, advice I ignored, and now I’m paying significantly for my naïveté.
People and their behaviour can and do change.
#15 San
Ditto.
It was “squirt” that alerted me to the eo ipso.
Excellent advice Garth!
Hopefully no one has their (secret) stash invested here:
https://www.coindesk.com/business/2022/10/11/breaking-news-solana-based-decentralized-finance-platform-mango-hit-by-potential-100-million-exploit/
#8 Old Boot on 10.12.22 at 4:48 pm
Wow, seems like you lost your motivation for treatment. Slipped off your meds a couple days ago?
I guess you are saying she is paying more income tax than she strictly needs to were she to transfer some income to me.
I can’t see her doing that. One of those people who just rolls her eyes on things like this. She earns it, she deals with the tax. Only a couple more years untill our incomes come a lot closer to the same round figure amount. Right now she makes over double what I receive as a retired person. Me, 50 ish , she 100+. My 50 sure does not go as far as it once would of , but not food bank time by a long shot.
Couples in a relationship might cite independence as a reason to hide money from their spouse or partner, it’s a slippery slope. Hiding money often affects more than finances; it leads to a breakdown of trust and communication. Money issues also tend to magnify the levels of power and trust between couples.
A money imbalance in relationships often causes more issues at some point in time and potentially end in divorce.
Money is difficult to hide in this day and age with all the different avenues that it can be searched out. Once a split up is under way, you might as well declare everything up front to avoid more expenses than it was all worth. Once you have reached your golden years, most pensions can be shared to avoid higher taxes, maybe this may be your best course of action to be open minded and enjoy those tucked away pensions like true love will never die.
Man up, hiding is for ostriches and at the end of honesty, you knew you could not fly in the first place.
If we had a dollor for every time someone tried to hide money and got caught, we could rain dollars.
Quote of the day: “It’s good to have money and the things that money can buy, but it’s good, too, to check up once in a while and make sure that you haven’t lost the things that money can’t buy.”
Once you co-mingle an inheritance it becomes part of net family property which is subject to equalization. Advice to keep the inheritance separate was legally correct.
Why would you not equalize with a person you share life with? – Garth
oh…man…
To guapo or not guapo?
We should all be guapo.
What a gig!
Ya know, the first thing I check is this:
https://www.google.com/finance/quote/BNS:TSE?comparison=TSE%3ATD%2CTSE%3ACM%2CTSE%3ARY%2CTSE%3ABMO&window=YTD
then I know how low my non-yeah oil Cdn ETF will go.
I like it that CIBC is two-stepping it make BNS not look as bad as they are. Shows solidarity.
Gravity.
—————
Please God, make US inflation low tomorrow.
Pretty please? With sugar on top?
I think there’s a sliding scale of comingling finances in a relationship.
Mrs and Mrs Old Boot maintain *separate* banking accounts, but we’re both technically co-holders of the other’s account. It’s largely a smokescreen for my other half to feel like she has control over what money she has to spend. No adult wants to feel like they’re being paid an allowance from their own money.
I pay all the bills out of my account, which receives income from our portfolio, and to which she contributes a fixed monthly amount towards expenses from her non-portfolio income.
We each have RRSPs, LIFs, TFSAs, and share a taxable account as directed by our esteemed host. Jointly file taxes, of course.
We pay ~$12/month extra for another bank account but really, I’m not going to quibble if it makes her happy. She’s much thriftier than I am and in no danger of blowing the budget.
You love your wife or lady friend; money is something you need in case you don’t die tomorrow. The residents of Kharkov have been ordered to evacuate the city. Someone is expecting something unpleasant to happen.
#11 Søren Angst on 10.12.22 at 4:54 pm
Turner Investments Marriage Counseling
– Ask Dr. Garth
[Ann Landers has passed the baton, on]
—————-
Topic yesterday on Twitter about mortgage fraud, some guess it is rampant. Ron the Mortgage guy (sharp, candor) figures in about 5% of the cases only
——-
It’s probably huge. Home Capital dumped a bunch of brokers for this same thing like 7 years ago. Hopefully not many of these loans were handed out by the regulated banks. Fraud seems to be skyrocketing in Canada.
Not sure it is a culture thing from our background, we share everything, joint banking accounts, credit cards, joint unregistered account, resp. I have all my wife’s bank account logins/passwords, even CRA’s (she used to have all mine). Now I manage money/investment/bills/tax including her TFSA/RRSP. I cannot image the other way around if money not shared. I make twice amount as her, whatever left after bills is our money.
Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston!
Garth, you are really connected, sign me up!
@#10 Wrk’dvr
“Furz will blow a gasket on this topic, Ponze. Watch!”
+++
Couldnt care less.
If couples dont want to share their financials.
That’s their biz.
Nice cat photo.
Holy Moses Garth & Holy Holopchi Batman.
Big banks have started increasing variance on the “Line of credit”. Guys who are maxed out will be paying Huge increment. TD wants
12.23%
interest on Line of Credit as of now …
https://twitter.com/himansh36013599/status/1580212358055890946
[another one of the good guys on Twitter]
Just checked my unsecured line of credit and it is at 8.20%, TD Prime Rate+2.75% – then again, a $0 current balance.
Double digit 1980s roaring back with a vengeance in the 2020’s.
PS:
For business accounts …
12.23%
Still, OUCH.
Ohhhh NOoooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The Make Believes are starting another season for deplorable Toronthole tonight!
But don’t worry, it’s different this time……..they’ll be playing in a city that has actually won the Cup in the last 30 Years!
Jen and Brad, just invest your money in Leafs souvenirs – you’ll get RICH selling secondhand crap to GTAhole losers who never learn!
Lolololololololololol!
Might this advice to co-mingle finances stem from a generation and time where divorce was the exception, not the expected end?
Or have I got my rose coloured glasses on about the good ol days?
“Love is good. Love with trust is way better.” – GT +++
True. But seldom do two individuals align with the planets when it comes to money. My observation has been that one of the two will be more inclined to gratification earned via impulse spending. One is generally more fiscally responsible, and the other will lobby to set aside joint financial goals in pursuit of ‘entitlement trophies’ ( i.e the status vehicle, golf membership, those expensive shoes on sale at Holt Renfrew, etc). Sigh. It becomes more complicated when the children leave the nest. Avoid buying any new real estate immediately thereafter like the plague.
My further observation is that nothing is ever 50/50.
Successful relationships require compromise, trade and negotiation. An equally shared passion or interest is helpful. Like cooking. Everyone needs to eat. You both cook, or one cooks and the other cleans up.
An opportunity to reconnect after long days or long weeks, with focus on the task at hand and other issues taking a back bench seat. Check out Wolfgang Puck’s secret to making good schnitzel if you think I am kidding. Who knew it was so damned easy?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jnUH6ez1F5s
+++
‘Guapo’ is slang for ‘handsome’. Like the song from ‘CATS’, he appears to have enjoyed his time in the sun. R.I.P….
“Touch me, it’s so easy to leave me
All alone with the memory
Of my days in the sun
If you touch me, you’ll understand what happiness is
Look, a new day has begun”-
(Songwriters: Trevor Nunn / Thomas Stearns Eliot / Andrew Lloyd-webber / Otto Eckelmann)
Why would you not equalize with a person you share life with? – Garth
Imagine one spouse inherits a 1 million in year 2 of the marriage , is the other spouse entitled to share in this , if they divorce 6 months after the inheritance ? . The Ontario Family law Act says no if the inheritance is keep separate.
Keeping it separate might hasten divorce. – Garth
Obviously everyone has different life experiences to draw upon.I would agree that a joint account and joint life goals are a must ,else why be together as a couple ?
Now how to fund the account is matter of where one is in life and which relationship number is it ,again life happens.
What worked for me is to fund the joint account( for all couple expenses ,household ,travel , big household purchases) proportionally based on income.
Define reasonable and stretch spending targets, Honda vs. Benz or Penticton vs. Cancun , SFH vs. townhouse /duplex/condo stuff like that .
And sorry to say so but as a male,a cohabitation agreement at teh minimum is a must , not because you expect the relationship to fail or you are not commited but for peace of mind. If 2 people don’t see eye to eye on this and start throwing all kinds of accusations , name callings than they should not be together long term.
The courts historically gave women everything or at least the vast majority under the sun from the so called ” joint assets”.
Again especially when it comes to retirement, common goals shall be funded proportionally based on income as you are a couple after all.
lovin lyin money alex jones 1b.
“scare us from freedom?”
a shame courts have taken this long time to go after this despicable deplorable….i hope the rest of those repeaters of conspiracy and lies suffer the same fate.
Ahh, another manufactured marriage b/c its what everyone else does! Lets go!
…and another engineer…snore me a river.
Quick note: Brad, fight for it, brother. Software eng, right, so…you know…umm, never mind.
Sorry to be the one to say this (Actually, I’m being polite)…but, you’re in it together, to win it, or you’re doomed..the sacred, or advantageous, bond of holy matrimony just whizzed right over your heads as just another sweet relic of the past, right? That’s cool!
I can help rekindle the fire! Starts with hugging – After showering, Brad (just sayin’)…twice never hurts! You know what they say about cleanliness?
Anywho, teamwork makes dreams work. At least past that sentiment on to the offspring.
Og
#42 under the radar on 10.12.22 at 6:11 pm
Why would you not equalize with a person you share life with? – Garth
Imagine one spouse inherits a 1 million in year 2 of the marriage , is the other spouse entitled to share in this , if they divorce 6 months after the inheritance ? . The Ontario Family law Act says no if the inheritance is keep separate.
Keeping it separate might hasten divorce. – Garth
///////////////
If that would trigger a divorce then was there true love in the first place.
Secondly if it was going to happen, the sooner the better.
Sound advice. Have your wills and POAs drawn up by a lawyer, hold everything jointly, and make sure your TFSA names your partner as a successor holder. Use a spreadsheet to track all your income and expenses. (Also handy when doing your taxes for deductibles like medical expenses.) And get a good financial advisor. There’s this guy, Garth Turner…
#25 the addict on 10.12.22 at 5:19 pm
#8 Old Boot on 10.12.22 at 4:48 pm
Wow, seems like you lost your motivation for treatment. Slipped off your meds a couple days ago?
*********
“The addict”?
Oh, dear sad Faron: You’re not a victim. You’re just trying to evade the entirely unnecessary, internalized guilt you feel for being a straight white male.
Just stop beating yourself up. It’s exhausting, even if sometimes amusing, to watch.
You’re the only one victimizing you and you’re free to stop anytime.
When I was 8, my parents got divorced. Not your typical divorce. It was the type of divorce that lawyers probably still talk about today. Through years of court battles, my parents put the lawyers kids through college, all while destroying our own net worth. In the end, the house was sold (to pay for the lawyers) and we moved from that nice big old house with a swimming pool into a 3 storey townhouse in a questionable part of town. My parents never shared finances. My dad would often say “Your mother has no idea what I even do for work, all she cares about is that the money is in the bank when she needs it”. And my mother would say “Your father never talks about finances ever, he won’t even talk about his work”. Hmm. Because of this, I grew up misogynistic – heavily influenced by my father who frequently told me “Never get married. Women only want to take everything from you”. And in my 20’s, I believed him. I lost a few great girlfriends because of my fear of committing. Then I met the love of my life at age 28 and never looked back. On our one year anniversary of dating, I proposed to her. My father told me I was crazy. Then I took it one step further and shared everything with her. We merged all of our finances, every last one. Joint bank accounts, joint wills, etc. It took an enormous amount of trust. This last year we celebrated our 10 year anniversary and while there is no guarantee we will make it to 20 years, we are chugging along nicely. My advice to anyone out there in the same situation as I was – jaded by their parents divorce – is not to let it control your life. Don’t be defined by other peoples lives. Committing yourself entirely to another person, and making yourself vulnerable, is difficult. However, when successful it can be the most rewarding and special thing imaginable. I hope 30 years from now my wife and I are still running strong like Garth and Dorothy. But the bar is set pretty high!
I married in my late 40s to a man who was retired with a pension. We share a child and had been living together for four years prior to getting hitched. My investments were respectable and well managed. (Still are.)
We pay our bills and mortgage with no pain. Unfortunately, Garth, we have found it best to keep our accounts separate. When my husband has one of his “drunk sailor” spending sprees or if I want to buy myself something like a vintage guitar, there is no arguing. It is our own money. I have seen too many couples who share accounts fighting over their personal purchases.
So I called the government today to make sure I qualify for the BC Climate yada, yada, tax credit.
The said they have two questions for me.
Do you read the GreaterFool blog?
I answered yes.
Do you read Faron’s posts about the climate?
Yes?
Then you qualify for $190 a year.
OK, I’ll take it.
I then asked why did Dr V get more than 190 bucks?
The answer was you get more if you actually correspond with him on the topic.
I’ll stick with just the 190 a year plan thanks…
M48BC
A friend was in Toronto visiting a relative who bought a town home for $800 000 seven months ago (single but has a good friend for a roomate). The mortgage payments WERE $2500 per month. She just got a warm notice from the nice lady at the bank stating that her monthly payments will rise by $900 to $3400 a month. Her good friend pays her $1000 for rent.
Friend got a notice that his LOC payment is going up by $500 a month.
@Soren…who woulda thought mortgage fraud shennanigans by some industry folk…
#42 under the radar
When my wife and I got married I had over $1 million she had 29k and owed her parents 10k for her car. When it was time for the wedding her parents offered to pay for the wedding as they did for her siblings. I respectfully declined the offer. I wrote a cheque to them for 10k for a repayment of the loan for my wife, they declined. We have no prenup if i didn’t trust her I wouldn’t have married her.
Together we’ve struggled having children but finally had 2 beautiful children with the help of fertility doctors.
My wife has been diagnosed with a lung condition that will shorten her life span. Money means nothing, remember time is the most important thing you have. If we were to get divorced I’d gladly walk away with nothing. She is an absolutely amazing mother wife and person. If you can’t trust your spouse enough not to screw you over you should be looking for a new one.
#137 DON on 10.12.22 at 11:28 am
#121 Ponzius Pilatus on 10.11.22 at 11:58 pm
#114 Old worn out boot
We have abandoned defenseless, traumatized, harmless, broken people to their addictions, and to the predators who roam freely amongst them.
—————————
So, what’s your solution?
********
Good question…will have to think about this one…maybe we should revisit the past with a dash of the future…but it will take a community approach for sure.
————–__________
It’s a societal country wide problem, that needs a country wide solution.
Vancouver and Victoria should not carry the brunt of the problem, just because the weather is more accommodating to people sleeping outside.
Seeing more and more RE commercials on Teevee.
A new slogan caught my eye:
“to each their home”.
Thanks for the replies.
I realized that I forgot to mention an important key factor:
We can’t afford to max two TFSAs at this time. Just the point in our lives with two young kids.
I will like to max two TFSAs in five years.
So this is why we try and fill up mine as much as possible because it already has a high (relative) amount in it.
jess on 10.12.22 at 6:20 pm …. ‘This must be what hell is like’: Alex Jones reacts to being ordered to pay $965 million to Sandy Hook families .. I wished there was a ” HELL ” for this sub-human filth Jones… He would have a very special place if there was…
Together for 24 years. Married for 17. No joint accounts, no shared investments. Shared HELOC though, and we talk money every day. I know what she makes and pays for, she knows what I make and pay for. As new expenses arise we determine how they are handled. Big ticket items (reno, vacation, etc.) are budgeted out with equitable (not equal) share of payment assigned to each spouse (and sometimes children). I get the shared account thing, but we tried it and it led frankly to many more and more bitter arguments than doing it this way.
Reading the comments here about people who keep things separate from their spouses, I can’t help but feel there is a difference between a “marriage” and a “partnership”. Some people refer to them as the same thing, but I think there’s a distinct difference.
Re: yesterday’s post about protests in BC:
“Our friend Honveer says incomes do not keep up with the speculators mortgage payments – he says in sophisticated countries it it is not like this and the Canadian govt needs to help.”
https://twitter.com/RE_MarketWatch/status/1580195642387083264
#13 Dragonfly58 on 10.12.22 at 4:56 pm
———————
What the hell did I just read? You’ve been married to your wife for 37 years, and you invoice her for car parts and drywall? Where am I?……
#48 Old Boot on 10.12.22 at 6:30 pm
13 comments in a tetch over 24 hours. Ruh roh
Thanks Garth, good post!
My wife and I have always used joint accounts as the clearinghouse for inflows and outflows. Then each partner can independently handle issues, especially if one of us gets hit by a bus. It worked when we were poor and it works now when we’re, ahem, less poor.
All registered and pension accounts are already individual, and for us with 8 of these type accounts between the US and Canada, that seems like plenty of finance independence.
Basically, income arrives direct deposit, most bills are automatically paid, and then our only real task is deciding who distributes the monthly surplus to the other accounts. We usually coordinate over romantic hiking or lunch dates.
Just had a lunch date today, as a matter of fact. I recommend Nanaimo’s Real Food as a fine spot for a sandwich, truly delicious soup, and cake dessert. Total with tip surpassed $10, though. I think maybe $50+ but didn’t really pay attention.
#57 robert james on 10.12.22 at 6:55 pm
jess on 10.12.22 at 6:20 pm …. ‘This must be what hell is like’: Alex Jones reacts to being ordered to pay $965 million to Sandy Hook families .. I wished there was a ” HELL ” for this sub-human filth Jones… He would have a very special place if there was…
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Figures he is also a fan of PP’s.
I’m going to be the unpopular person here.
While in many cases it might make sense to have finances joint, there are many cases where it is not in the best interest of specific people.
In the example provided here, I would agree with amalgamation of finances simply because they started from a similar position and there is not enough complexity for further division.
I find that most people do not put in the necessary effort to have a very clear and articulate approach to a financial goal and live life very much day by day. It’s an invitation for disaster as finances are the cornerstone of life. It’s not the most important thing in life but a lack of clear planning results in it being the source of most problems.
#44 jess on 10.12.22 at 6:20 pm
lovin lyin money alex jones 1b.
“scare us from freedom?”
a shame courts have taken this long time to go after this despicable deplorable….i hope the rest of those repeaters of conspiracy and lies suffer the same fate
————–
What about the corporations and the governments that lied about the thing that they forced you to take? How does that make you feel? Do you hope they suffer the same fate as well? I sure do.
“Toronto received a score of 2.24 and Vancouver 1.70, making them the two most at-risk cities in North America. The U.S. cities on the index were “overvalued,” but below the bubble risk level.”
https://www.thestar.com/business/2022/10/12/toronto-now-has-the-highest-housing-bubble-risk-in-the-world-international-report-finds.html
#46 Penny Henny on 10.12.22 at 6:27 pm
#42 under the radar on 10.12.22 at 6:11 pm
Why would you not equalize with a person you share life with? – Garth
Imagine one spouse inherits a 1 million in year 2 of the marriage , is the other spouse entitled to share in this , if they divorce 6 months after the inheritance ? . The Ontario Family law Act says no if the inheritance is keep separate.
Keeping it separate might hasten divorce. – Garth
///////////////
If that would trigger a divorce then was there true love in the first place.
Secondly if it was going to happen, the sooner the better.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Guessing here, but I suspect the legal reason for treating inheritances differently from all other assets acquired during a marriage/partnership is to ensure that the decedent’s wishes are fulfilled and said inheritance goes to the person (not couple) they wish it to go to.
The beneficiary is completely free to add an inheritance to a joint account. There is no legal barrier to that. – Garth
#51 Flop
Pay no attention to that Faron thing …..it’s a bot!
A twitter bot apparently-Elon said.
Nefarious robot.
Uh oh, spaghettio.
Looks like another oppression farmer has misappropriated someone else’s identity.
Woman-face
Black-face
Indigi-face
It ain’t easy being …. vanilla?
Honestly, is there anything more racist and condescending than a white woman thinking that she is the best candidate to advise and advocate for Indigenous people?
https://www.cbc.ca/newsinteractives/features/mary-ellen-turpel-lafond-indigenous-cree-claims
Reading these comments about people in relationships and not sharing finances. Next July marks 30 years married…..a very important part of that was to fully share all finances from the start…..that’s why we said those words ‘for richer or for poorer’….its a joint, non negotiable agreement that we made when we chose to spend the rest of our lives together…..and had we played the ‘This is mine and that’s yours’ game….well, we would still be married but it would not have been nearly such a rich experience. And, also, from my experience, of the people we knew who got divorced, this kind of ‘yours and mine’ way of thinking about money was the wedge that brought relationships to an end. But hey, whatever floats your boat…..
Great advice. Two gaps in my situation seem to be needing to get a will and POA and change the non-registered account to joint. Nothing in the non-registered currently as focussing on TSFAs, but if this market drops another 20% or so may have to deploy excess cash through it.
14 Dave
“But prices are slightly higher…..Double Wow”
——————————————————
They could be a little higher when you compare Sept 22
to Sept 21.
On the island, prices are only down 0.5% in that time frame.
But they are down 14-15% from peak.
http://www.vireb.com/assets/uploads/09sep_22_vireb_stats_package_64850.pdf
#53 I’m stupid on 10.12.22 at 6:41 pm
If you can’t trust your spouse enough not to screw you over you should be looking for a new one.
__________________________
I retired at 35, 12 years ahead of my wife, broke.
She retired with a DBP.
I take $100 a week for my tool and car build habit.
Other than that everything is ‘ours’. Amazing what can be done with $5200/year! We have never paid anyone labor, (except the dentist). Another $100/wk for building materials, since 1981. Constant improvement, same property.
I ran into some family money and passed all of it across the table to her/into the float.
She has a travelling bone. That’s where 1/4 of the income goes, either we go together, or she goes with a friend or relative, paying their share.
39 years married now. We are both keepers.
How do Jen and Brad even do their taxes, if they know nothing of each other’s finances? Does each have their own accountant, and the two accountants sync their tax data with each other?
Maybe their taxes are as simple as exchanging the net income figures (e.g. no donations), and as thirty-somethings, they can be forgiven for not ever having heard of superficial losses.
Flop Drops.
Day late, buck short and all that, I wanted to show a good one yesterday for the Surrey protests, they made me wait a day.
The details…
12299 112a Ave Surrey.
Original ask. 1.09
Sold for 880k
https://www.zealty.ca/mls-R2682590/12299-112A-AVENUE-Surrey-BC/
So when I first saw the exterior photo, I thought it was just a bulldozer job, but while hardly luxurious, it’s more liveable inside than first glance.
So someone snapped up a detached house in Surrey for less than 900k, the occasional one happens, trajectory of market suggests they will become more regular.
Still well above assessment, decent size block if they decide to develop.
Someone snapped up a nice mature landscape block yesterday with a huge backyard and nicer structure for 1.2, in nearby North Delta yesterday.
Another one in Chilliwack sold in the mid 500s.
In the meantime, these guys to start bringing in some revenue, might as well put a pumpkin patch in that muddy yard…
M48BC
Guessing here, but I suspect the legal reason for treating inheritances differently from all other assets acquired during a marriage/partnership is to ensure that the decedent’s wishes are fulfilled and said inheritance goes to the person (not couple) they wish it to go to.
The beneficiary is completely free to add an inheritance to a joint account. There is no legal barrier to that. – Garth
^^^^^^^^^^^
I knew someone was going to make that point.
I should have added to my comment that giving the inheritance special legal treatment at least makes it POSSIBLE for the decedent’s wishes to be carried out.
Of course the beneficiary can do whatever they want with the inheritance after they receive it (and maybe the decedent would not have cared), but at least they have the option to segregate it.
Otherwise inheritances would always go straight to a couple (presuming beneficiary partnered up) which might make some people reconsider their beneficiaries if they know that it MUST BE split with said beneficiary’s spouse.
As an aside, it is my understanding that the investment income earned from an inheritance cannot similarly be attributed to the beneficiary but rather would be shared as part of the equalization process in event of a divorce.
It’s ironic. We have a daughter and son-in-law who operate on the same wave length as your sample couple. Late 30’s (geriatric millennials they call themselves).
He makes and she makes much more than my wife and I ever dreamed of/retired on. Still after 12 years they too share a 2 year old and a mortgage. Buy their own cars, submit separate income tax and don’t we dare suggest what you speak of.
We started off sharing all our info, debts, ups and downs but hey, we’re too old to know what the real world is like….and they’re both in the executive side of banking, one green and one blue…..huh, go figure.
#62 the addict on 10.12.22 at 7:27 pm
#48 Old Boot on 10.12.22 at 6:30 pm
13 comments in a tetch over 24 hours. Ruh roh
************
Narcissist’s accusations are nothing but projection. We all know who has the soc media addiction. You’ve already admitted to it. Good for you. It’s the first step. We’re rooting for you, buddy.
Now try to wean yourself off stalking me.
#14- As usual they know how to spin the numbers. Don’t expect to get the whole truth from the real estate industry. Apparently house prices are down 20% in the last few months and will continue down. Condos?
#77 Otherwise inheritances would always go straight to a couple (presuming beneficiary partnered up)
edit: Otherwise inheritances would always be included in calculation of marital assets and equalized should the couple divorce
Vot is going on in the equity markets. Sideways this week.
Here I sit broken hearted, tried to short but only started.
————
In our forum host’s 416 prefecture this blight I’d before mentioned will be torn down – for kandos natch.
They type of place which would give aid and comfort to Pony Tail Guy.
.City of Toronto announces 45 The Esplanade Novotel shelter will be closed by the end of 2022 and restored to regular hotel service in 2023 (twitter.com)
https://urbantoronto.ca/database/projects/45-esplanade
45 The Esplanade: a proposed 36 and 36-storey mixed-use condominium building designed by IBI Group
—–
—– Whatever are these hotel-cum-shelters like inside? A local Redditor reports on a similar setup.
“”I routinely run calls to the Delta hotel at Kennedy/401. What was once a beautiful hotel is now trashed. And that’s an understatement. I commend the city for housing the vulnerable during covid but the people that have moved in don’t respect anything. The residents were given free shelter, access to medical services and they destroyed the place. Zero respect for anything. 9/10 calls there result if some level of confrontation also. Crime in the immediate area has skyrocketed and the overflow of people has resulted in tent encampments in the surrounding area. The Delta is nothing more than a drug den now. Its disgusting.””
51 Flop
“I then asked why did Dr V get more than 190 bucks?
The answer was you get more if you actually correspond with him on the topic.
I’ll stick with just the 190 a year plan thanks…”
———————————————————-
I am currently abstaining from engaging with that poster…..
But do check out Port Alberni if you are considering the island. It’s not to everyone’s liking, but it has the basic amenities – hospital, hockey, Walmart – and the best RE value of the larger island centres. Did I mention it gets toasty too?
Trackie, I think you are looking up North, but I’ve been all over the province and my favourite region is the Kootenay’s.
I’ve only been there in the summer, admittedly, but I think the winters are cool and crisp, with not as much rain as the coast.
You mentioned 200k for a banger in Prince Rupert.
This one is on for 199k, not a lot of privacy, but it seems to tick a lot of other habitual pastimes…
M48BC
“Welcome to the Mountain Shores Resort and Marina Cooperative! This budget friendly lot is a great opportunity to enjoy all the benefits of the first class Mountain Shores Resort and Marina with all its amenities. This Kootenay Lake lot allows you to enjoy an assigned 24 ft boat slip in the marina with boat gas for members of the cooperative only, build a small cabin, vacation or full time home on Kootenay Lake. This lakeside gated community has newer cabins and homes and comes with community water and sewer hookups and full time caretaker on site. Buy now with no timelines to build and keep your boat in the large marina and be ready to enjoy the four season Kootenay Lake lifestyle. Fishing, kayaking and watersports abound on Kootenay Lake, and you’re also close to all other outdoor sports and recreation activities including quading,hunting, hiking and more. Plus, you’re close to Crawford Bay artisan shops, shopping, and the renowned Kokanee Springs Golf Resort too. Don’t delay- make your move now to join in the fun with your family and friends! “
https://www.realtor.ca/real-estate/24461598/13488-lakeshore-drive-boswell
“#40 Rook on 10.12.22 at 6:09 pm
Might this advice to co-mingle finances stem from a generation and time where divorce was the exception, not the expected end?
Or have I got my rose coloured glasses on about the good ol days?”
—————————
Divorce gets a bad rap. The only other way to end a marriage is through death.
For the 21 years my wife and I (second marriages for each of us) have been together, we have kept everything separate to a point, but we do have joint accounts in principle (in case one of us dies). She controls hers, I control mine, and the total household expenses are proportioned in terms of the relative fraction of our take home income (around 45% to 55%). No advantage in spousal accounts as we earn close to the same. I can’t recall us ever having an argument about money, and we both prefer it this way….
#141 under the radar on 10.12.22 at 12:28 pm
Toronto Community Housing – Government run housing. Likely the worst landlord in the Country , miles of work orders, billions in unfunded repairs . Bad Idea.
===
That’s right, the government is not the best landlord.
But – it is either apartments with overdue work orders, or no place at all.
Born in the early 80s.
One new born with partner (not married).
More then a 1/3 of our friends are divorced/separated with or without kids. Always a mess. Always about money.
No thanks, better to keep separate, but with commun goals:
We have a % allocation (+/- 60%) of our incomes to match a defined commun budget (household expenses, vacay, car, baby+ RESP, commun saving ect..) so it is proportionate to our income and fair (we earn more or less the same).
Rest is at no one else business.
Different people have different comfort levels about shared finances. Marriage means different things to different people. Garth is providing excellent guidance for those aiming to optimize financially. But it comes at the expense of personal independence. For some, marriage is the becoming of one. For others, marriage is two entities living independently together to achieve some economies of scale and emotional support for each other. I say, find the balance that makes you most comfortable. Maximizing financial return doesn’t always have to be the #1 goal.
I wonder if the “Old Boot” will become the “New Sailo”.
He’s already laser focussed on Faron.
#24 ElGatoNeroYVR on 10.11.22 at 2:47 pm
The quickest is to:
– remove the tax rate on rental income for the next 5 years ; yes subsidize landlords so more rental are now market viable.
– evictions for non-payment of rent within 2 weeks of due date should be automatic , no filing , no counter application required; tenant pays or not ,maybve give them 7 days grace period once a year.
– evictions for any/no reason with 60 days notice and one month free rent allowed given the property is not going back for rental for 6 months after
– tenancy boards should not take more than 7 days to hear any issues not covered above ,they will have plenty of time if points 2 and 3 are implemented.
===
That’s too radical for all rentals, would give too much power to commercial landlords and multi-rental amateurs.
The rules should be changed just for cases when a landlord has just one tenant or one tenant family, and they live at the same house. Let them terminate the tenancy with a 90-days notice and without any reason. Few will abuse that option, a good landlord values a good tenant and vice versa. Set municipal advisors who help the landlords plan a tenant suite and get the permits, for free or for a fixed fee. Offer loans for the rebuild, to be repaid as the rental money come. Then the owners will be more interested to offer their excess space to tenants.
The lawyer who told the woman not to commingle money with her husband is just plain wrong. That’s 19th century thinking. A lawyer not knowing that the judge will split the estate according to the law must have got their shingle in a third world cereal box, ignorant. Divorce doesn’t mean you get to hide assets from partner. Quite the opposite, you can go to jail for such things. Your legal spouse is entitled to what a judge decides not you, thems the breaks. Have kids? Expect a very heavy hand. Ergo, all cash , investment and credit must be commingled in a unified financial plan to coordinate bill paying etc to ensure maximum financial efficiency.
Ha! Ha! the women have got you on this one. They operate on an emotionally laden meta language that can destroy rhetoric, when they want to.
#87 Michael in-north-york on 10.12.22 at 10:00 pm
#141 under the radar on 10.12.22 at 12:28 pm
Toronto Community Housing – Government run housing. Likely the worst landlord in the Country , miles of work orders, billions in unfunded repairs . Bad Idea.
===
That’s right, the government is not the best landlord.
But – it is either apartments with overdue work orders, or no place at all.
———————
The City of Vienna owns and runs over 220,000 rental units.
Over 70 % rent.
The “Most Livable Place on Earth”.
I myself was a proud renter for 7 years.
Felt no shame, and no one looked at me in a disgusting way.
It can work when landlords and tenants respect each other.
One other thing about couple finances…. They can be considered assets under one umbrella. For example, cibc has a higher tier service if you have $100k assets under them. This service, imperial service, offers better discounts and higher rates on gics, and your own manager! If you’re a bit short of $100k, your spouses assets under cibc will count as yours under the same umbrella. Voila! Welcome to imperial service. It works for other banks too, like RBC private wealth, combine your assets such that sum of your parts is greater than your parts alone!
Hello. Could I split my capital gains income tax (from selling stocks) with my common law wife if all the money is in my account? We are listed as common law to CRA. Thanks
Nice try. – Garth
Garth and Dogs…
Check this out!
“Change.org
Donna — “I got my first home and now my entire pay (less 42 dollars) is going towards my mortgage payment.” Many homeowners in Canada are struggling to keep up with ever-increasing mortgage payments. In an attempt to curb inflation, the Bank of Canada has raised interest rates five consecutive times since March 2022 — one of the bank’s most aggressive hiking cycles ever conducted. The bank’s interest rate impacts the rates that Canadian consumers get from their banks on things like lines of credit and mortgages. With experts predicting that interest rate hikes will continue, homeowners are urging the government to provide relief from rising rates. You can help by adding your signature.
Home Owner’s Relief
6,799 have signed BC Inflation’s petition. Let’s get to 7,500!
Sign now with a click
The Bank of Canada continues to raise interest rates at a staggering pace and not allowing Home Owners to adjust accordingly. Further, the BC
Provincial Government has taken measures such as 2% rent increase cap without any counteracting measures to provide relief to Home Owners so that the Home Owners could also have a fighting chance against inflation. The Bank of Canada should come up with other strategizes instead of flatly and across the Board increasing the BoC’s Overnight Rate. The Federal Government and the Bank of Canada are simply waiting for hard working Home Owner Canadians, who borrowed to buy a home as a responsible and productive member of the economy and the Canadian Society, to go under before they think of meaningful strategies?! We urge you to sign this petition and letting the Government along with the Bank of Canada know that they are hurting Canadians in their rapid response to fighting inflation, instead of looking at alternative ways to help bring Canada out of this situation. The Government and Bank of Canada must understand that the current debt levels of Canadians are out of their control. External global factors affecting the economy are unique factors of the current Canadian society which cannot simply be balanced by old methods/simple strategies as they have been been implementing in the past. Government and Bank of Canada must change and develop new strategies of different slabs regarding overnight interest rates for the residential, commercial, agricultural, and other line of credit products to help fight the current inflation situation. This should be done in a way that gives HOME OWNERS a relief of a reasonable (bearable) residential overnight interest rate which ultimately allows the HOME OWNERS a fighting chance against the current inflation!”
@90 ponzi:
Are you paying attention?
‘Old Boot’ is self proclaimed as a lesbian with views similar to Sussex Kathleen Stock as far as I can discern, and has boots on the ground experience with issues such as street violence and drug use that most of us can only pay lip service to….
I think her comments on the challenges of EMS in all major cities (as well as other communities) are very insightful. I recently chatted with an EMS employee in Calgary who estimated at least 10% of calls were drug related. It’s difficult to imagine the PTSD impact on those who serve our communities in that field…. I worry about it.
Stagflation look it up.
#92 Bobs not happy on 10.12.22 at 10:20 pm
The lawyer who told the woman not to commingle money with her husband is just plain wrong. That’s 19th century thinking. A lawyer not knowing that the judge will split the estate according to the law must have got their shingle in a third world cereal box, ignorant. Divorce doesn’t mean you get to hide assets from partner. Quite the opposite, you can go to jail for such things. Your legal spouse is entitled to what a judge decides not you, thems the breaks. Have kids? Expect a very heavy hand. Ergo, all cash , investment and credit must be commingled in a unified financial plan to coordinate bill paying etc to ensure maximum financial efficiency.
——–
Here, let me Google that for you.
https://www.separation.ca/help-centre/division-of-property/inheritances-gifts
“The value of gifts or inheritances that you or your partner received during your marriage are excluded from the division of property upon separation or divorce. You may not know, however, that you have to treat those gifts or inherited items in a specific manner in order to take advantage of that exclusion.”
#44 jess on 10.12.22 at 6:20 pm
lovin lyin money alex jones 1b.
“scare us from freedom?”
a shame courts have taken this long time to go after this despicable deplorable….i hope the rest of those repeaters of conspiracy and lies suffer the same fate.
—
Hey Old Boot! What’s it like sharing a low-fact ideology with the subhuman, Alex Jones?
#54 Ponzius Pilatus on 10.12.22 at 6:42 pm
#137 DON on 10.12.22 at 11:28 am
#121 Ponzius Pilatus on 10.11.22 at 11:58 pm
#114 Old worn out boot
We have abandoned defenseless, traumatized, harmless, broken people to their addictions, and to the predators who roam freely amongst them.
—————————
So, what’s your solution?
********
Good question…will have to think about this one…maybe we should revisit the past with a dash of the future…but it will take a community approach for sure.
————–__________
It’s a societal country wide problem, that needs a country wide solution.
Vancouver and Victoria should not carry the brunt of the problem, just because the weather is more accommodating to people sleeping outside.
*****
Yup it is a Country wide problem that is for sure. The solution needs to be structured around the greater good as we are all affected in some way or another. Harsh medicine for the bad that’s for sure.
My wife and I take an allowance from our shared accounts every month. Spend it on whatever we like, no questions asked. It’s about 5% of our monthly income each. 15+ years and almost no money arguments. One of us earns about 4x the other. Hope this helps.
#22 BlueBombersDynasty on 10.12.22 at 5:13 pm
Speaking from experience…my personal opinion is this…
If you make significantly more, or are on track to make significantly more money than a potential future live-in “partner”, obtain a cohabitation agreement prior to moving in together.
Agree with BlueBombersDynasty. Be afraid, be very afraid of cohabiting with a partner making significantly less money then you. Be utterly terrified if you have children with them. If you’re in the unlucky 50% who end up separating, be ready to give up 50%+ of your net income. In what other circumstances would you ever accept such odds?
I’d suggest to any young person to hold “similar income potential” as a very significant selection factor. Sounds very calculating, but it will be a lot less calculating than your lower income partner’s lawyer calculating their cut.
And no, i’m not in this position myself thankfully, but have witness many others get raped and pillaged through family court.
#90 Ponzius Pilatus on 10.12.22 at 10:12 pm
I wonder if the “Old Boot” will become the “New Sailo”.
He’s already laser focussed on Faron.
—
Well, both hold views I find detestable. But, there’s an abiding angry darkness in Old Boot’s obsessive trans hatred that creeps me out. I think that Sail Away is primarily an oblivious narcissist who gets off on toying with people.
#8 Old Boot on 10.12.22 at 4:48 pm
#114 Old worn out boot
Meaningful consequences are powerful motivators
—
You do realize that many addicts on the street have been through one or more rounds of treatment to no avail, right? That the drugs out there now (fentanyl) are a far cry from the heroin (opium?) that was prevalent in your day? And you think that threatening to withhold benefits will do much of anything other than drive some (deeper) into sex work and others into (more) petty crime including greater likelihood of abuse within the community? Do you think that any consequence will matter more than the onset of dope sickness when supply runs out?
I’ve taken my fair share of first aid courses taught by old, embittered ex-EMTs who think they are gods for scraping people off the street and bridging them to definitive, emergent care. Good on ’em, it’s got to be a hellish job and people are saints for doing it. But you don’t know jack about medicine nor psychology nor addiction as an EMT relative to your superiors in medicine and it shows in your “solutions”.
#12 Divorce-Lawyer on 10.12.22 at 4:55 pm
A pessimistic view on divorce:
Divorce lawyers need ‘churn’ and couples’ conflict to keep the money flowing…
Don’t have a lot of family assets? Quick divorce, pay up now. Move on to the next client.
Large family assets? Keep ’em at each other throats and drag this on for years and appeals… Billable hours up, new car for me, Mr. Lawyer.
=============================
The first thing a lawyer does is send a letter with lots of exaggerated faults of the other spouse. This gets the other spouse to support the legal system pronto.
The damage is done already and is usually irreversible.
The 2 lawyers have their way with the couple until they deem there is nothing left to rape from them.
The legal system has destroyed all trust in the institution of marriage. My own kids don’t want to take a chance and while I have had a divorce I have a wonderful marriage for the last 22 years.
Solution: Take Lawyers out of the family separation process and institute a system of counselling and negotiated separation with and possible binding arbitration using impartial third parties.
There should be no cost to the couple. The societal problem of marriage breakdown is as urgent as homelessness and drug abuse. Just look at our birth rate. No one wants to take a chance any more.
People are not given the legal implications of marriage on the altar. They blissfully marry and do not know the huge trap laid for them by our vicious legal system of vultures. Lawyers are batting around 50% and looking to improve their score, and income.
#55 Ponzies Prices
“Seeing more and more RE commercials on Teevee.”
+++
How much money DO you save with tv rabbit ears?
Great advice, and I’m very happy to see this is a cat blog now.
Can someone explain this comment please?
“Have a joint non-registered investment account. This may allow for lower taxes since the returns can be split between both instead of landing in the hands of one.”
@#74 Wrk.dvr
“I retired at 35, 12 years ahead of my wife, broke.”
+++
Ah the good old days when you could grow dope outside in the back 40 as a mortgage helper….
My understanding is that contributions and their resulting income have to be attributed to the partner who supplied the money. Is there a way around this?
#49 Adam
We merged all of our finances, every last one.
—————————————————————————————————–
On our first date with my (now) wife, I took her to see Apocalypse Now.
On our second date we went to the local TD Bank and got a joint chequing account.
40 years later…happily ever after.
Toronto is now Number One! Hurray!
https://www.thestar.com/business/2022/10/12/toronto-now-has-the-highest-housing-bubble-risk-in-the-world-international-report-finds.html
#97 Don
Homeowners protesting “high rates”..that are not really high at all…now I have heard it all.
No protest about savers getting nothing for a decade….
When we “owned” a home….we always set aside a few bucks monthly for the unexpected…..entitlement at its finest…thanks for the post! Got my morning eye roll in early…
It seemed to me the buyers yesterday were the definition of picking up nickels in front of a steamroller.
Steamrolled on very expected inflation.
Usd cash going uppa again. 1.395. Mercy.
US 2 year rate approaching 4.5% today. 10 year rate over 4%. “Restrictive Policy” is 50 bpts over the 2 year rate. fed funds needs to be at 5% TODAY to slow the economy down. we are nowhere near where we should be.
stocks have not adjusted to this reality. they are going much much lower. CORE CPI has accelerated. HOPING it comes down without a HARD LANDING is sticking your head in the sand.
STRUCTURAL inflation is now here. it will take a decade or more to unravel. Bonds are in a SECULAR BEAR market. yields are going much much higher over time.
stocks, well, you can figure that out.
US inflation print came in hot! Look at below.
Life is terribly uncertain and unpredictable. Death. Divorce. Love can turn nasty, sometimes violent. Each person should always have an account in their name only. Always. And never ever intermingle an inheritance. Ever. Especially a big one. Sorry Garth. Not every marriage is like yours.
Mortgage rate up again today. Good luck to all
Please God cut the power to Faron’s computer
Biden gonna need another one of those inflation reduction acts.
The folly of blowing trillions on green energy will help ensure inflation remains strong.
Again, 3200 sp is where to start buying
#101 Faron on 10.13.22 at 12:05 am
#44 jess on 10.12.22 at 6:20 pm
lovin lyin money alex jones 1b.
“scare us from freedom?”
a shame courts have taken this long time to go after this despicable deplorable….i hope the rest of those repeaters of conspiracy and lies suffer the same fate.
—
Hey Old Boot! What’s it like sharing a low-fact ideology with the subhuman, Alex Jones?
************
Biology is a “low fact ideology”? Goodness me.
Well, I’ll certainly stop repeating such nonsense as “you can’t be born in the wrong body”, and “mammalian sex is binary and immutable”, along with “transition doesn’t cure autism, personality disorders, or homosexuality”.
Really Faron, your touching child-like faith in the moral superiority of your own beliefs has far more in common with reality-deniers like Alex Jones, and homophobes like the Jonesboro Baptist Church, than my stubborn views of biology and aberrant psychology.
This issue, as with our drug problems, has been fueled by the “destigmatize everything” experiment that is being conducted on our society.
Post-modernists use language to obfuscate truth. “Destigmatization” actually means “de-pathologization”, meaning that there should be no recognized norms by which we can pathologize(or criminalize) behaviour falling outside those parameters.
If there are no accepted norms of human behaviour, mental illness ceases to exist. If mental illness ceases to exist, we must find new words to explain aberrant behaviours like transvestic fetishism, using lethal drugs instead of eating and sleeping, and randomly hitting strangers with blunt objects.
“Trauma” is the most over-relied upon post modernist buzzword. Trauma now causes every ill under the Sun. Except for the stubborn fact that there’s absolutely no proof of it. Post modernists want us to believe that correlation is causation, when it suits their ideologic narrative.
Which leads to the corruption of the scientific method, as demonstrated by the troubling reproducibility crisis in so much of what is still considered accepted research.
And now we have scientific journals that will not publish any research that supports a conclusion which may hurt someone’s feelings, but they will publish research that actually doesn’t support the author’s conclusions.
Bullies love social justice activism. It let’s them feel morally superior while abusing ‘bad’ people who hold ‘heretical’ beliefs. They’ll espouse whatever beliefs their tribe tells them to, if it let’s them act on their anti-social urges.
Trying to draw parallels between someone who denies that a tragic event took place and uses their reach to inflict psychological torture on those directly affected by the tragic event, and my belief that male transvestic fetishism is a psychological disorder, is definitely some kind of pathology. And it should probably be stigmatized.
Seriously, get help.
#107 crowdedelevatorfartz on 10.13.22 at 7:24 am
#55 Ponzies Prices
“Seeing more and more RE commercials on Teevee.”
+++
How much money DO you save with tv rabbit ears?
———————————-
I grew up without Teevee and bought my first small black and white when I was about 26.
And yes, it had bunny ears.
#84 Flop… on 10.12.22 at 9:13 pm
Trackie, I think you are looking up North, but I’ve been all over the province and my favourite region is the Kootenay’s.
I’ve only been there in the summer, admittedly, but I think the winters are cool and crisp, with not as much rain as the coast.
You mentioned 200k for a banger in Prince Rupert.
This one is on for 199k, not a lot of privacy, but it seems to tick a lot of other habitual pastimes…
M48BC
“Welcome to the Mountain Shores Resort and Marina Cooperative! This budget friendly lot is a great opportunity to enjoy all the benefits of the first class Mountain Shores Resort and Marina with all its amenities. This Kootenay Lake lot allows you to enjoy an assigned 24 ft boat slip in the marina with boat gas for members of the cooperative only, build a small cabin, vacation or full time home on Kootenay Lake. This lakeside gated community has newer cabins and homes and comes with community water and sewer hookups and full time caretaker on site. Buy now with no timelines to build and keep your boat in the large marina and be ready to enjoy the four season Kootenay Lake lifestyle. Fishing, kayaking and watersports abound on Kootenay Lake, and you’re also close to all other outdoor sports and recreation activities including quading,hunting, hiking and more. Plus, you’re close to Crawford Bay artisan shops, shopping, and the renowned Kokanee Springs Golf Resort too. Don’t delay- make your move now to join in the fun with your family and friends! “
https://www.realtor.ca/real-estate/24461598/13488-lakeshore-drive-boswell
_______
Seems like a tailor made retirement villa for us crustomudgeons haha! Looks like just a bare lot for 200K though – title is “unknown”. I think once they figure it out, there may be some monthly fees involved I bet. I think I’d still opt for the 1-200K dilapidated BC shack over this lot deal.
121 Bdwy on 10.13.22 at 10:33 am
Again, 3200 sp is where to start buying.
——————————
You do that.
The S&P not even worth half of that on a great day. The overvaluations cannot be put into words. It was on it’s way to 1500 before plunge protection Jerome and his gang of crooks stepped in back on March of 2020. Now these central bozos have painted themselves into a cozy little corner. Economic crisis everywhere. All because assets had to continue to inflate during a worldwide pandemic and economic shutdown. You cannot make this stuff up I swear.
Good luck everyone.
Sail Away, you’d be hard pressed to find yourself in a jurisdiction under common law as you’ve described. It’s certainly not found in BC under the Family Act where all assets all assets are divided equally.
“Don’t use separate banks for your TFSAs or other accounts. Coordinating assets will be a nightmare. Do not maintain separate savings accounts. Why are you hiding money from each other when it should be working for mutual benefit?”
I don’t understand how separate TFSA’s or other accounts in separate banks make coordinating things a nightmare? My wife and I (22 yrs married) have always kept our own accounts but we coordinate. I actually do all the investments for both of us with her input on hers of course. We discuss financial stuff all the time. We do have one joint investment account but otherwise everthing is separate as it was when we married. Nothing is hidden, just no need to merge. We have wills, every account has the spouse as beneficiary etc. The only benefit I see is that on death it will be a few extra steps to access the others account. Same accountant does both our taxes, and we try and structure things to make the most sense from a tax perspective. If she wants to buy a new car she does so from her account – same if I want a nice bottle of scotch. I think there are many ways to make this work although some things (wills, taxes) should absolutely be done, but no need to have only one bank account to make this work. Anyhow, works for us just fine.
#110 crowdedelevatorfartz on 10.13.22 at 7:31 am
@#74 Wrk.dvr
“I retired at 35, 12 years ahead of my wife, broke.”
+++
Ah the good old days when you could grow dope outside in the back 40 as a mortgage helper….
___________________________________
Wayyyy too paranoid for that game.
When I smoke that shit, I feel like turning my self into the cops, and dabbling in religeon.
Nah, when I retired broke, it was because we had paid off every loan, just returned from our first five month drive around the continent on her first deferred leave, and NAFTA was about to eat my business.
So, we hired me, full time as property manager, fleet maintenance, and driver for all of my wife’s union business travels.
My mandate was to not spend money on my self personally, beyond the previously mentioned $100/wk, which has never been adjusted for inflation.
Thus, I have to drink homebrew, but lack of travel expenses due to covid allowed me to specuvest in my pallet of booze from those funds.
But the tax advantages for my wife have been stellar!
Harper even gave us pension income splitting!!!!
Our tax bill is about 6% of take home.
I do recall your scribe about your spendy ex. There is no one like that in our marriage.
Next year, I will have been retired half of my life, and my wife is now retired over one quarter of hers.
Cheap rural living, ocean in the front, wilderness in the back. Do it yourself is the key necessary element.
#126 Bobs not happy on 10.13.22 at 11:06 am
Sail Away, you’d be hard pressed to find yourself in a jurisdiction under common law as you’ve described. It’s certainly not found in BC under the Family Act where all assets all assets are divided equally.
———-
Let me google that for you, Bob:
https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.candidlegal.com/amp/share-inheritance-in-divorce
‘In British Columbia, inheritances and gifts from third parties are considered excluded property. Excluded property is property that is not shared on divorce. The relevant statutory provision is section 85 of the Family Law Act, here).’
#94 Ponzius Pilatus on 10.12.22 at 10:41 pm
The City of Vienna owns and runs over 220,000 rental units.
Over 70 % rent.
The “Most Livable Place on Earth”.
I myself was a proud renter for 7 years.
Felt no shame, and no one looked at me in a disgusting way.
It can work when landlords and tenants respect each other.
===
Europeans are good at managing their public assets. Here in North America, public often means second-rate. Unfortunately.
“Shame” should not be a factor at all. Own the place, rent the place, live with parents – whichever works for you. Ignore the opinion of other people who have no skin in your game.
Interesting that U.S. Social Security payments are increasing by 8.7 % starting Jan. 2023. Thats on top of 5.9% the year before.
Retired beavers on the other hand, got 2.7% starting Jan. 2022, I have not seen any numbers announced for 2023 yet.
I somehow doubt Canadian retirees are only experiencing about 1/2 of the inflation that U.S. retirees are experiencing.
#115 Bdwy on 10.13.22 at 9:01 am
It seemed to me the buyers yesterday were the definition of picking up nickels in front of a steamroller.
///////////////
The steamroller must of zigged when the markets zagged.
#110 crowdedelevatorfartz on 10.13.22 at 7:31 am
Ah the good old days when you could grow dope outside in the back 40 as a mortgage helper….
———-
I really do miss those good old days when I could go into stores with only 25 cents in my pocket, and come out with four chocolate bars, two cans of Coke, a decent pair of gloves, a set of coloured pencils, and a tube of lipstick for my mum.
THESE days, stores have cameras all over the place.
#105 Faron on 10.13.22 at 4:17 am
#90 Ponzius Pilatus on 10.12.22 at 10:12 pm
I wonder if the “Old Boot” will become the “New Sailo”.
He’s already laser focussed on Faron.
—
Well, both hold views I find detestable. But, there’s an abiding angry darkness in Old Boot’s obsessive trans hatred that creeps me out. I think that Sail Away is primarily an oblivious narcissist who gets off on toying with people.
***********
I don’t hate men who take wrong-sex hormones and have cosmetic surgeries.
I hate men who demand that women and girls accept that heterosexual men with fetishes belong in spaces where we’re vulnerable, and who abuse anyone who protests this assault on our dignity and safety. You do know that nearly all men with transvestic fetishism are straight, don’t you?
Our government recognizes that paraphilias such as transvestic fetishism are linked to an increased risk of sexual offending, yet it still went ahead and allowed men to self identify into women’s spaces. No diagnosis, drugs, surgery or even long hair required. Just a fervent belief that they’re special is enough.
https://www.csc-scc.gc.ca/research/shp2007-paraphil08-eng.shtml
Women aren’t emotional or sexual support systems for men with fetishes. Men should be more tolerant of their diverse brothers, and quit trying to make them womens’ problem.
Core inflation in the US up again. Turns out that hiding in our basements for 2 years may have a long economic tail – cure being worse then the disease.
Also, there was no scenario whereby housing could crash and the markets would be unaffected. All those waiting for cheap houses will get what they wished for, but it comes with 30% less in your investment account and a recession.
All very predictable, this economy – all of it not just RE – was fueled by free money and things are going to get way worse before they get better. Centrals have no idea what they are doing – as if 4% rates could quell 8% inflation. My call is 2 more years of pain and 5-7 more of dead money. This is the big one.
ECB deluded dovishness won’t save this market.
Dead cat bounce. But what a bounce. Sell it.
https://www.forexlive.com/centralbank/ecb-staff-model-sees-lower-rate-peak-than-market-report-20221013/
Not to mention the average U.S. Social Security monthly payment was $1500.00 U.S.D. in 2022.
Canada , $680.00 – $750.00 ( tiny little Canadian $ } depending if you are under or over 75 years old.
I sure am glad the cost of living is so much lower in Canada compared to the U.S.
Otherwise Canadian retirees could be in real trouble compared to their U.S. counterparts.
Yes I know, the medical coverage situation is the great equalizer.
#74 Wrk.dover on 10.12.22 at 8:02 pm
I retired at 35, 12 years ahead of my wife, broke.
____
Some day, I’d like to hear the *real* story why you quit working at 35 while totally broke. Because that definitely ain’t any kind of retirement plan I ever heard of.
#122 Old Boot on 10.13.22 at 10:33 am
Skimmed it. The usual hyped-up, ideological take on a complex issue that relies on excessively amplifying one set of views. This is obviously due to your utter conviction that you are right while ignoring the likelihood (mich greater than 50%) you aren’t and further ignoring the great harms your views and implementation of your views will do.
Any good scientist takes ideological whackadoodles like you with pounds of salt. I take yours with about 1000. I know the areas in my life where I need help and where I struggle, you callously used one expression of that to harm me and try to shut me down. That’s an extremely crappy thing to do and leaves me wondering how much further digging you have done to potentially harm me. That’s pathological by defn and gross.
Methinks you need help. Cluster A might be a good mirror for you to look into given your level of paranoia around trans people and constructing a reality to meet that paranoia.
Also, not a sex/gender/sexuality blog. I’m done with this topic and will not even skim anything further you concoct because I already know everything you have to say about it minus the brooding darkness I mentioned before.
#49 Adam
Thank-you for those comments Adam. You, and your partner, appear to have your heads screwed on very well.
My wife and I will reach our 43rd anniversary in December. We married at 23/24 yrs of age after meeting in London…. she from Christchurch NZ and me from Edmonton…. decided to settle in Edmonton (NZ, geography and climate are excellent, but the standard of living, and career/work opportunities were better in Canada… and we were also thinking of providing the best opportunities to our planned children). Anyway, we each had no assets to our name when we married, so started at square one. Never occurred to us to not share everything, finances included. It has worked out extremely well. I suppose it might be easier to do that when you are both young and starting out with nothing when you get together… as opposed to each having already accumulated assets before doing so. But that does not mean it shouldn’t be done. You have to show each other that total commitment to each other, otherwise your marriage is founded on quicksand. Adam, you’re doing it right… Best of luck to you and your wife.
My buddy’s had his place for sale for a couple of months. The infinity pool overlooking all of Nanaimo is pretty cool, but they’ve decided it’s just a little too big for just him and his wife, haha:
https://www.remax.ca/luxury/bc/nanaimo-real-estate/3410-arrowsmith-rd-wp_idm00000051-911938-lst
Here you go Flop:
https://fairsquare.ca/on/sudbury-northbay-ss-marie-thunder-bay/terrace-bay/home-for-sale/hab-41-southridge-cres-d24951502#description
Yeah, it’s not perfect and needs work, but it’s move in-able, and the work needed is cheap and easy. Lots of potential here IMHO. Terrace Bay is a nice little town right on Superior. Not too far from Lake Nipigon either. Other than highway 11, there’s almost nothing to speak of north all the way to Hudson’s Bay. T-Bay is about 2 hrs away if you need to go on a shopping spree. This could be a nice little northern crib for little input.
I’d offer 110K and put 20 down, for a 90K mortgage. That’s 121.00/wk at 5%. Even Wrk.dover could afford this place with a small allowance increase from his wife.
‘Course you might need to get a job at the Paper Mill, and then you’ll need a good pair of wool socks and a snow scoop. Or – a good remote job.
With all the surplus cash you’d have, you could save up for one of these and do some backwoods camping, with the side benefit of being able to bug out anywhere if Trudeau keeps getting elected and the SHTF :) :
https://sherpatvsales.com/
friends with benefits ?
chopping someone’s “ass” from the rest of their body parts and then stashing the parts in a suitcase get ya a billions of dollars weapons contract.
I saved his a–‘: Trump boasted that he protected Saudi Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman after Jamal Khashoggi’s brutal murder, Woodward’s book says
“I was able to get Congress to leave him alone. I was able to get them to stop.”
https://www.theatlantic.com/ideas/archive/2022/09/donald-trump-maggie-haberman-mar-a-lago/671510/
https://www.nytimes.com/2022/05/22/business/jared-kushner-steven-mnuchin-gulf-investments.html
https://theintercept.com/2022/10/11/mbs-saudi-oil-biden-october-surprise-election-interference/
transparency/honesty in all relationships
More than 600 journalists at 151 news organizations in 117 countries worked together to make the Pandora Papers a reality — the largest collaboration in journalism history.
The Pandora Papers’ revelations about the financial secrets of prime ministers, oligarchs, mobsters and other powerful figures spawned action by governments and international groups, triggering investigations, legislation and rule changes in dozens of countries.
Impacts keep coming.
In August, Le Monde revealed that French anti-corruption officials had opened a probe of former Czech prime minister Andrej Babis, whose secret $22 million purchase of a chateau on the French Riviera had been exposed by the media partnership.
The investigators are looking into Babis’ real estate deal to assess whether he may have laundered the proceeds of tax fraud, according to exclusive information obtained by Le Monde, an ICIJ partner.
https://www.icij.org/investigations/pandora-papers/one-year-on-pandora-papers-continues-to-be-anti-corruption-tour-de-force/
Just days after the Pandora Papers’ publication, U.S. legislators introduced a bill that would force attorneys, art dealers and trust companies to investigate clients from abroad seeking to move money through the American financial system. The legislation, known as the Enablers Act, has since gained significant momentum, and in June was added to the National Defense Authorization Act — fast-tracking the bill and significantly increasing the likelihood it will become law.
https://www.icij.org/investigations/pandora-papers/one-year-on-pandora-papers-continues-to-be-anti-corruption-tour-de-force/
couple of wives blackmailed?
These few details were outlined in an FBI affidavit in support of the criminal complaint in February 2020. It also revealed that Cabrera-Fuentes, 37, told FBI counterintelligence officers that he had two wives and two sets of young children, one in Mexico and another in Russia.
Valeyeva was with Cabrera-Fuentes when he studied for his PhD in the German city of Giesen. She went to Russia with their children for a visit and was prohibited from returning to Germany, according to the FBI affidavit. This was how Russian intelligence was able to blackmail him into spying.
Cabrera-Fuentes’ cell phone showed that there had been interaction between him and a Russian handler. The handler promised to help Cabrera-Fuentes get his wife and their daughters out of Russia, according to the affidavit.
The charging documents said the Russian handler instructed Cabrera-Fuentes, through an associate, to rent a condo in the complex where the target lived. He was given $20,000 for rent and a down payment toward the costs.
https://www.occrp.org/en/37-ccblog/ccblog/16871-scientist-convicted-for-helping-russia-spy-on-us-had-high-level-mexican-political-connections
The FBI described Cabrera-Fuentes as a “co-optee,” used by a Russian intelligence officer to provide “a layer of obfuscation” between himself and the target.
Tom Brady’s life time earnings $385M,his wife $400M+.
#129 Sail Away
Isn’t the wording ‘ excluded’ referring to assets timely registered and accepted by court prior to marriage union ? Post union inheritances like lottery wins are shared common property. Contentious registered asset trials argue the prenuptial document and value prior to union.