Duty of care

Mom is 83, has the dreaded A-disease and stays in the ‘memory care’ wing of a retirement home in the burbs. “It’s tough to visit her now,” Nolan told me. “Not much there.”

I said I knew. My father, Archie, ended his days in a similar state. He’d always been a statuesque figure, chairman-of-the-board type guy with a signature white moustache. One day I visited and half of it was gone, shaved off. “Mother told me to do it,” he said. She’d been dead for sixty years. But that’s what the curse does to you. Jumbles the brain. Old becomes immediate. Five minutes ago is gone. The past bubbles up to smother the present. It’s not peaceful. The frustration in his eyes as he fought the swirl, tethered to a wheelchair, is with me still.

Decline and demise are inevitable. Elderly parents are a burden. Expensive, too. Nolan is discovering along with so many other adult children what the end of life can mean to the entire family. “I knew about situations like this,” he says. “But I never thought conflict would happen here. To us.”

When Mom could no longer manage, her two boys sold the house and put her in the facility. The $600,000 in real estate money went into a high-interest, 1.5% savings account, where it’s sat for two years. Every month the cost of her care ($5,000) exceeds her pension income by $3,100 – money which comes out of the bank account. But the real problem is she now needs 24-hour supervision, for which the tab is an extra three grand.

I asked Nolan what twisted logic kept him from investing the funds to gain growth (to support her) rather than draining away the principal. “My brother,” he said. “He refuses to allow it since there could be losses and he wants his share intact.” In other words, bro is counting on Mom’s timely exit, which also has him blocking her access to needed care.

Turns out both are executors of her will, and both hold power of attorney for her personal care. A lawyer told Nolan the only way he can act unilaterally, in the best interests of his mother, is to obtain a court order. Good bye brotherly ties, forever.

There are some lessons in this small story, now oft repeated amongst many families.

First, understand what being a POA means. In accepting the appointment as someone’s power of attorney, you have a legal duty for their well-being. This fiduciary responsibility requires that you put their interests ahead of your own. To do otherwise would be illegal, as well as amoral and unethical. You cannot act in a manner that will create a conflict of interest. Instead every decision must address this question: “Is what I am doing completely for the benefit of that person?”

Second, appointing multiple, equal POAs is probably a dumb idea. Especially your kids, or anyone else who may become a beneficiary of your estate. Find a knowledgeable, trustworthy, independent and make them the primary POA. If they’re unable to perform this task later, have a secondary (alternate) POA nominated.

Don’t make your kids your executors. Another awful idea. You can read all the reasons why here.

Understand what memory/brain diseases – dementia, Alzheimer’s – are all about. They’re progressive, incurable, disturbing, relentless and don’t actually kill anyone. The body does that. It can take years, even decades for the long goodbye to occur. If there’s a history in your family, prepare. This could require oodles of money, plus a healthy conversation before it begins.

Speaking of which, Nolan and his brother would be smart to invest Mon’s cash in the same kind of balanced, diversified portfolio that they’d set up for themselves. She could live another decade, during which a return of 6% or 7% could bridge the gap in her care cost, still leaving the bulk of her wealth as a potential estate.

Given the piteous level of interest on ‘safe’ investments, having an all-bond or GIC-only portfolio risks running out of capital. Sticking it in equities magnifies market risk. So a 60/40, low-cost, tax-efficient balanced ETF portfolio could be perfect. Monthly income could be structured as return of capital, keeping taxes low – as would ensuring the TFSA is always topped up and revving.

Finally, kids, expect zero. No legacy, no windfall.

It’s not your money. You earned none of it, so anticipate nothing. When a parent struggles and needs help at the end of the day, extend it freely. Spend it all on their behalf. Be selfless and giving. Treat him or her as you would wish to be treated. That is your inheritance.

237 comments ↓

#1 friend to cats on 03.13.18 at 5:36 pm

Sometimes you post stories better left untold. This is one of them, shame on the brother.

RIP Archie Turner.

#2 Leo Trollstoy on 03.13.18 at 5:40 pm

#205 Penny Henny on 03.13.18 at 10:34 am
Boy oh boy. Ross missed the peak by 4 years

my grandpa wayne pitzel also missed it by 4 years

he passed in 2013

4 years is nothing in the scheme of things

a 2017 downturn is still going to hurt a lot of ppl

#3 Eyeguy on 03.13.18 at 5:40 pm

Thoughtful and sensitive advice. Thanks.

#4 Scrawed Canadian Millenial (TM) on 03.13.18 at 5:42 pm

If we all spend our savings on our Boomer parents, then who will buy all of those condo units at Mizrahchi One Bloor, an 85 story tall condo tower?

#5 Pacman on 03.13.18 at 5:43 pm

Thanks again for a great post. Wish more people would read it. Particularly the last paragraph….

#6 Stan Brooks on 03.13.18 at 5:44 pm

Be very scared:
around 24.15 of this recording:

https://livestream.com/accounts/650767/Panel/videos/123147514

Is it too early to say of these policies (low interest rates are translating into actual economic growth.
(i.e. they do not know what they are doing)

In my view the world can stay with Nominal Negative Interest Rates forever, they are something natural as a means to stimulate the economy.

She mentioned boundaries of deeply negative interest rates would need to be established.

Carolyn Wilkinson, the next boss of BOC after chicken little retires due to health issues

=========================

Our conversation concludes on an optimistic note:

“We’ve survived 200,000 years as humans,” says Taleb.

“Don’t you think there’s a reason why we survived? We’re good at risk management. And what’s our risk management? Paranoia. Optimism is not a good thing.”

Is the paradox, I ask, that human pessimism offers grounds for optimism? “Exactly,” Taleb replies. “Provided psychologists don’t fuck with it.”

#7 I’m stupid on 03.13.18 at 5:45 pm

Sad!

#8 Ray Skunk on 03.13.18 at 5:46 pm

I hate reading stories like this; disgraceful behaviour motivated by greed. Putting money (that isn’t yours) ahead of the health and well-being of your own mother, for crying out loud. I can’t comprehend it. What’s worse is that the money, if and when it comes, will likely be wasted away on crap material possessions.

Nolan’s brother is absolute scum of the earth, IMO.

I’m fortunate in that my brother and I – while not wealthy by any stretch – have arranged our financial futures without reliance on any kind of windfall. We continually tell our parents to piss all their money away on vacations and such. They earned it, they enjoy it. If they need looking after, they’ll be taken care of. That’s what loving families do, not bicker over an inheritance when the death hasn’t even taken place yet.

#9 Zapstrap on 03.13.18 at 5:47 pm

When a parent struggles and needs help at the end of the day, extend it freely. Spend it all on their behalf. Be selfless and giving. Treat him or her as you would wish to be treated. That is your inheritance.

Did exactly this for my late father … leaves you with great peace of mind … which is priceless. He was “lucky” in that he exited in a hurry. RIP.

#10 Biddy on 03.13.18 at 5:47 pm

Wow great post and depressing but then reality often is.

#11 Blacksheep on 03.13.18 at 5:48 pm

Ice bergs is all I’m saying..

#12 crowdedelevatorfartz on 03.13.18 at 5:53 pm

Stories like that never cease to amaze me.

The children fighting tooth and nail for the parents “Living will” or the “Will”.

Its not their money.
They didn’t work for it or earn it.
Yet they expect it.

Unfortunately karma usually doesn’t reign supreme.

What about setting up a Trust with the parents’ money that pays for the parent(s)?
With an executor that draws a small salary to oversee it and any payouts ?

#13 Dead Cat Bounce on 03.13.18 at 6:00 pm

Good post thanks Garth !
Mother’s 89, she struggles with this more all the time. She’s in a great care home and my sister and I are happy that she can keep her dignity. I’m thankful she’s still alive and can spend time with her every weekend. Whatever is best for Mom is best for us.

M54BC

#14 Wrk.dover on 03.13.18 at 6:01 pm

Is Poloz a plant from an enemy government?

Or is he just another vegetable on Prozac?

Or both?

#15 mitzerboyakaQueencityKidd on 03.13.18 at 6:04 pm

the guy protecting the dog from rain is going to heaven
for sure.

#16 SoggyShorts on 03.13.18 at 6:04 pm

#198 Stan Brooks on 03.13.18 at 9:31 am

If you believe that last 4-5 winters in the northern part of the northern hemisphere were warmer, like Canada or UK, that is just fine.
I am not arguing with believers.

*****************************
Of course I don’t think the winters were warmer, that would be wrong.

The term global warming has confused a lot of people who aren’t willing to do any research. That’s why they use the term “Climate Change”

However, global warming actually causes colder winters in the north.
Here’s a source with a pretty simple explanation, feel free to find your own.
https://www.popsci.com/warm-arctic-cold-winter

#17 Whinepegger on 03.13.18 at 6:08 pm

Forwarded this post to many of my kith & kin. Thank you.

#18 Game Over on 03.13.18 at 6:10 pm

There is currently a lot of promising research going in to Alzheimer’s, CTE and other neuro-degenerative diseases.

Hyperbaric Oxygen therapy has been shown to potentially treat and reverse, to a degree some of the effects of Alzheimer’s. Also, a new treatment that was being explored for Diabetes was found to a beneficial effect of AZ.

Additionally, A steady regimen of exercise, coffee, Omega 3, sleep, THC, CBD and even micro dosing of Psilocybin has the potential to greatly prevent the onset of AZ.

With an ageing demographic and growing rate of incidence, the cost to society will be massive. This is something to invest in surely.

https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2017/12/171205120013.htm

http://www.iflscience.com/brain/heres-why-lsd-microdosing-could-be-the-next-major-breakthrough-in-mental-healthcare/page-3/

https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/320491.php

https://www.salk.edu/news-release/cannabinoids-remove-plaque-forming-alzheimers-proteins-from-brain-cells/

#19 islandgirl on 03.13.18 at 6:10 pm

I tell my parents (who are still in mostly full capacity) to spend and enjoy and that I expect nothing to be left for me after they are gone. The frequency that I have seen the story above though saddens me.

#20 AM on 03.13.18 at 6:11 pm

Couldn’t agree with you more Garth.

#21 namename on 03.13.18 at 6:12 pm

Short and simple it is her money and if they to spend every red hot cent of it on her care they should because they are entitled to NONE of her money.

#22 Stan Brooks on 03.13.18 at 6:13 pm

How about governments?

Shouldn’t there be a decent pension system so she can actually count on it when needed?

I bet she paid 40 + years in contributions, shouldn’t that be sufficient for 5-10 years in a special care facility? (on average less than 3)?
Why is there no subsidized insurance for that while there is CHMC insurance?

Why is her house the biggest asset that she has?

Why it is becoming the norm to spend everything and not to be able to pass anything to your kids?

Of course the kids should (and normally will) stand for their parents, the question is would they be able to afford it.

What is the chance of the average person being able to:
1. pay the house – 1.5 mil shack in Vaughan + interest
2. pay for raising the kids
3. pay your student debt
4. save for your own retirement
5. support your parents, including special care facilities
6. pay ever increasing taxes, including property, carbon, you name it, while experiencing inflation but no wage growth.

How much would you need for that? 3 millions, 5?

and on which one should you compromise if not able to fulfill all of it?

This is a decent article but it should be send to Poloz (in particular) Wild Bill and T2.

BoC policies in particular are and will be the main reason for bankrupting seniors in the future.

Imagine seeing homeless people in such state on the streets.

#23 IM in C on 03.13.18 at 6:18 pm

And now the contrarian view:
If you do not protect your inheritance, you can be very sure someone else will be getting it !!

#24 Guy in Calgary on 03.13.18 at 6:20 pm

Family disputes or “differences of opinion” are sadly very common. See it all the time working at a CU with an older membership.

It’s always sad and there’s always that one person, in this case the bad bro.

#25 Reality is stark on 03.13.18 at 6:23 pm

The best you can hope for is to be gone within 30 years.
All the policies our new politicians want replicate current Venezuelan policies. Our young have Venezuelan ideals.
Schools are churning out social justice warriors at an alarming rate and these folks do not believe in incentive.
You’d be shocked how quickly a society can be decimated in one generation.

#26 espressobob on 03.13.18 at 6:27 pm

Blaze your own trail, like my elders taught me.

Good advice.

#27 Linda on 03.13.18 at 6:33 pm

Totally agree with Garth on how ‘the inheritance’ isn’t the property of the inheritors but rather the property of the parent who needs it for care.

#28 The Great Gazoo on 03.13.18 at 6:34 pm

“It’s not your money. You earned none of it, so anticipate nothing. When a parent struggles and needs help at the end of the day, extend it freely. Spend it all on their behalf. Be selfless and giving. Treat him or her as you would wish to be treated. That is your inheritance.”

Garth, that was a pretty impressive close. You are doing your part to make this a better world. Thank you.

#29 Josef on 03.13.18 at 6:35 pm

Amen!!! Oh Yeah BABY!!! YEAH!!!

#30 Howard on 03.13.18 at 6:36 pm

I thought long-term care in a provincial facility is covered publicly, although the government claws back all OAS (and possibly CPP?) the moment an elderly person enters a LTC home. If you want hire care workers for extra stimulation and company throughout the day that would be paid for out-of-pocket, but I thought the 24-hour medical care and meals were provided by the province within designated LTC facilities.

I’m speaking here of Ontario, but I doubt that varies significantly province to province.

Go and visit one. Then see if you want your mother there. – Garth

#31 Ima Fakeologist on 03.13.18 at 6:40 pm

Nothing divides families more than death – and then money.

What a thoughtful post, Garth.

I’m sending to my parents to see if they still want my sister as executor.

#32 sm_yycbksc on 03.13.18 at 6:41 pm

Such a bitter truth of life. things that greed for money make you do….such a shameless brother!

Lesson – get an executor!

#33 Trojan House on 03.13.18 at 6:41 pm

My mother will by 80 in June and has dementia. My dad, who is 80 and was her primary care giver, was not able to take care of her anymore and had to put her into a home a few months ago. I was there to visit her on the weekend. It is very sad to see a parent like that.

I know the cost of having her there and it is not cheap. I am not really sure who has POA or will be the executor of my dad’s estate when he passes away, although I assume it is my brother because he is a lawyer.

My dad has invested wisely over the years so I think he is okay. I don’t know if there is an inheritance and I don’t care. As someone mentioned, it is his money and he can do what he wants with it. I hope my brother and sister feel the same.

#34 Grateful Boomer on 03.13.18 at 6:42 pm

Heartbreaking , yet all too familiar story. Nolan needs a court order. That’s a brotherly tie worth cutting….forever

#35 akashic record on 03.13.18 at 6:44 pm

Every month the cost of her care ($5,000)…

I think the overwhelming majority of Canadians don’t make $5.000 per month after tax in their prime these days.

#36 Lee on 03.13.18 at 6:44 pm

She must be in an expensive private retirement home because 5100 a month in almost double what a private room costs in most nursing homes. Then he says he needs 3000 more monthly because of Alzheimer’s. he should look at government nursing homes.

#37 The real Kip on 03.13.18 at 6:47 pm

I seldom agree with one of your blog posts from start to finish but tonight is one of those nights. Keep up the good work.

#38 Buttonbox42 on 03.13.18 at 6:47 pm

Went through this with my mum, seven long years in secure ward. Just a note to wish you a Happy Birthday tomorrow. Enjoy your blog, just read comments that you comment on. Share this birthday as well. Have a wee dram…slainthe mhat

#39 young & foolish on 03.13.18 at 6:48 pm

In my opinion, it seems reasonable that “Stimulating the economy” should mean going beyond just low interest rates and include creating a positive environment for new enterprise and investment.

#40 Cheekmonster on 03.13.18 at 6:54 pm

And we can add nursing home abuse to our list of worries. The way the govt treats the elderly is shameful!

Here’s an episode of CBC Marketplace (Nursing home abuse, violence) https://youtu.be/gk5iEo-s_6M

#41 akashic record on 03.13.18 at 6:54 pm

#22 Stan Brooks on 03.13.18 at 6:13 pm

What is the chance of the average person being able to:
1. pay the house – 1.5 mil shack in Vaughan + interest
2. pay for raising the kids
3. pay your student debt
4. save for your own retirement
5. support your parents, including special care facilities
6. pay ever increasing taxes, including property, carbon, you name it, while experiencing inflation but no wage growth.

How much would you need for that? 3 millions, 5?

and on which one should you compromise if not able to fulfill all of it?

Little chance, which leaves no other option but #6, of course.

Let your MP know and ask if he/she/etc. has any better suggestion.

#42 young & foolish on 03.13.18 at 6:55 pm

According to Poloz, Canadian household debt has done the necessary lifting in place of government since the GFC. Can this be right?

#43 Grey Dog on 03.13.18 at 6:58 pm

My 87 year old Dad just broke his hip at Christmas, in hospital til mid January, came home using private Personal Support Workers round the clock first 48 hours, then just kept staff morning and evening. PSW bill for first month $10k, final bill yet to come in. He just moved into independent senior residence, home will be going on market in the spring. All he believes in are GICs, I CANNOT convince him otherwise! There was a REAL CROOKED LAWYER in Brampton back in the 60s, he witnessed a lot of farmers who sold their property invest this lawyer that they even went to High School with burn through their money…didn’t spend 1 day in jail!

#44 Rooster on 03.13.18 at 7:02 pm

I know too many people who struggled with elderly, infirm parents including myself and my spouse. By sheer coincidence, last night we were visiting some former neighbours who just moved into a very nice, very new retirement residence. At their age (90+) all their old friends have departed.

The good news is they are still sharp as tacks, and very happy in their new digs. Their only complaint is the food, which, when you have only one functioning sensual organ is a big deal. We brought pizza and their eyes lit up like children. For the price they are paying I would expect a variety of filets on demand. They can afford the rent ($$$$), and neither had jobs or a house that I would expect to provide such salubrious surroundings. They attribute their financial health to their investment advisor, and I got his name (but you couldn’t pay me for that).

I need to return to fix their rockers, they’re not off them, but the company (who shall remain nameless, for now) didn’t deliver the models they sat in. Either that, or they lost a lot of muscle mass in a week, cuz neither can pull the reclining levers, and even I had some difficulty. I’m prescribing lithium grease, and also designing some lever lengtheners (investment opportunity?)

The moral of the story is if you think you were cursed with the longevity genes, just pay the man his dues. And make friends with people much younger than you.

#45 For those about to flop... on 03.13.18 at 7:06 pm

This article shows you how Great Dog Parks determine unemployment and wages…

M43BC

“This Chart Shows How GDP Determines Unemployment & Wages Over the Past 20 Years.

The United States hasn’t seen GDP growth over 4% since the year 2000, but President Trump recently said he thinks 6% GDP growth is within reach. What would that look like for the American economy and what could people expect in terms of employment and wage growth? Take a look at our new visualization.

We retrieved the data relating to GDP, unemployment, and median income from the online financial magazine The Balance, which compiled its figures from the respective offices of the U.S. government (see the viz for sources). To generate our viz we first adjusted median income totals to account for inflation, also called real income, so that we could make true comparisons between different years. We then plotted figures for every year since 1997 on the same graph, revealing a quick snapshot of 20 years’ of economic history.

GDP is an old school measure of the economy that originated during the industrial era. Many people think it doesn’t matter anymore because it fails to capture the changes in the quality of products in use at any given time. For example, GDP counts the physical costs of telegrams against the physical costs of email without considering the less tangible benefits of using the latter. GDP also ignores entire industries geared toward creating high-quality experiences (as opposed to physical products). That being said, it is still a shorthand way of measuring the health and trajectory of an economy, and it says a lot about both unemployment and wage growth. Developed countries like the United States typically have slower GDP growth than developing ones, like India or China.

Looking at the real median income figures tells an interesting story. The numbers have actually declined in 11 of the past 20 years, meaning that workers in general have smaller paychecks. As our graph demonstrates, wages are inversely correlated with employment. In other words, as employers shrink the number of individuals they employ the supply-and-demand effect allows them to pay their people less. Alternatively, when employment ticks up and labor becomes scarce, wages shoot back up. If the past is any indication, recent headlines suggest that American workers are due for another pay raise. In fact, in our graph 2016 was the best year for median incomes, rising 3.2% over the previous year to $59,039.

Things have generally been going well for American workers with GDP growth of 2-3% every year. Doubling that output to 5%, or even 6% as President Trump would like to see, would mean colossal and sustained gains in real wages for workers. We aren’t talking one-time bonuses thanks to a tax cut, but thousands and thousands of dollars in extra base pay. As long as inflation stays under control, additional increases in GDP would only benefit American workers even more.”

https://howmuch.net/articles/gdp-unemployment-wages-in-USA

#46 Whatcha Minnie on 03.13.18 at 7:07 pm

Today I drank coffee, forwarded mailing address, changed locks at old house, replaced thermostat, touched up painted my uncles bathroom, and sealed up the return air area underneath the air handler in a garage that was open to the underside of the bathtub and open to the attic. Also picked up bonded pine to stain tomorrow for my wife’s bakers rack we painted awhile back. Today was a good day.

#47 NorthernDean on 03.13.18 at 7:09 pm

I read every one of your columns. While I disagree with some of what you express, I do appreciate your opinion.

In this case, I agree with you wholeheartedly. You speak with the authority of someone who’s been subject to the pain. Thank you.

#48 Smoking Man on 03.13.18 at 7:11 pm

Been there done that. I’ll drive a rental car off a cliff before I put my kids through that shit.

I got cliff picked out already…

To watch your folks who you dearly love evaporate in front of your eyes in extreme pain is not fun. Beilive me.

#49 Tbone on 03.13.18 at 7:12 pm

I got a good one…
Three siblings have to sell mom’s home .
Mother went to old age home .
So one sibling decides they want to match offer and buy the house.
This one figures on some capital gain savings , and takes out a mortgage for 2/3 of the value of the house and pays off the other two siblings.
One of them immediately goes off and buys expensive suv.
The other banks the money , didn’t really need it but wtf.
Fortunately pension proceeds and some gic’s will get mom to the
Promised land , but money definitely has no friends.

Don’t trust your kids to do the right thing , in this case the favourite one
Did the dastardly deed. Get an attorney to govern your affairs.

#50 tccontrarian on 03.13.18 at 7:13 pm

Agreed!

I (only) have POA and I am sole executor. Brother is a I-want-it-all-for-myself type of person (because, get this, he’s older by 3 years!), and my parents recognized this by the time he was 2 or 3 years of age.
When dad died 4 years ago after many years fighting Parkinson’s, said brother never showed up to pay respects. Too much hate (and trauma) to overcome, I suppose. I found a way to forgive him, when I realized that by forgiving you ‘free’ yourself from the past.

TCC

#51 SW on 03.13.18 at 7:14 pm

Wise words, Mr. Turner. There are ghastly stories in my own family of people fighting over peanuts and shiny trinkets.
And lifelong rancour as a result.
Nolan’s had a lesson in understanding the character of his brother.

#52 tccontrarian on 03.13.18 at 7:14 pm

Whatcha Minnie on 03.13.18 at 7:07 pm

Do you have a purpose in life other than being a freakin nuisance???

TCC

#53 Marc on 03.13.18 at 7:17 pm

This is the best post I have read. Thanks.

#54 mark on 03.13.18 at 7:18 pm

Sad. I wouldn’t say this is advice, but look into the role of carbs and sugar.

I recently got myself off them and the effect on my brain and mental clarity is astounding. It’s like I’ve been walking around in a fog previously. Not to mention my belt size went in two holes.

#55 David on 03.13.18 at 7:20 pm

My 54 yr old sister is the poa for my 87yr old mother. Mom is still of sound mind. Recently looked at an rrsp statement and noticed a one time $50K with drawl a yr ago. I asked mom what happened: sis, her poa, convinced her it was best spent putting granddaughter into private school. I know mom “approved” and there wasn’t undue coercion, but I guess the OPP might view it as breach of trust. Kids shouldn’t be poa, ever.

#56 Mark on 03.13.18 at 7:21 pm

“She must be in an expensive private retirement home because 5100 a month in almost double what a private room costs in most nursing homes. “

Around here, full level long-term care costs the taxpayers between $120k and $160k/year, not including long-term capital costs.

Basically its getting to the point here that taxes are almost being directly shoveled straight from the pockets of the young and into supporting the old. I’m not sure how sustainable that is, especially if demographics change enough due to immigration, and younger Canadians no longer feel like paying half their income to pay for the healthcare of “old stock Canadians”.

Its rather bizarre, a country will guarantee a minimum income of $17k for any long-term Canadian citizen over the age of 65, but tells 18-year-olds that they must go into extreme amounts of debt to get a basic post-secondary education, and stupefying amounts of debt to enter into home ownership.

#57 waiting on the westcoast on 03.13.18 at 7:22 pm

My sister and I have the opposite problem. Our parents have both just been touched by cancer but seem to have made it through the first wave. We continue to try to force them to spend and they resist (children of the depression / war).

They are chatting about going to Italy to see family and wanted to stop in Madrid in Spain (they have never been there). I said, stay a week so you can go slow and enjoy the sites. My Dad goes, that would cost too much… Two days max… Sad. But hey – bigger stash for my sister and I. ;-)

#58 Free Bird on 03.13.18 at 7:23 pm

Garth, agree totally with the POA as well as DNR. Easier done earlier. Hope you don’t mind my adding some info that’s more health then financial. I wish Nolan and all coping with AD the very best. We lost my wonderful MIL to a form of dementia. She had her good days…and not and many can relate. She was small in stature but big laughs on laughs and stubborn.

Nolan may hve heard of this but here are some links to the music for memories project which started in the US but is now being used by the Cdn Alz society. Preview of orig documentary (must watch if you want a break from dark news cycles).

https://youtu.be/jyfau4T-ZTc

More info:

http://alzheimer.ca/en/kfla/We-can-help/Support/Music%20for%20Memories

https://musicandmemory.org

Please anyone who has a loved one with dementia or AD take a few minutes to look into this amazing project. It’s not a cure but can improve the quality of life. Also look into new studies on meditation/yoga for AD.

Sorry for going off topic. Hope it helps someone.

#59 Sam the Sham on 03.13.18 at 7:25 pm

DELETED

#60 Expat on 03.13.18 at 7:29 pm

Money and family don’t mix well. I moved out as a teenager and supported myself ever since. It was very hard and I made a lot of mistakes and was very poor at first but I’m better off for having done so.

My siblings on the other hand, have been leeching off my wealthy parents for their whole lives and are now utterly dependant on them for financial help. In the last 5 years alone I can recall multiple “loans” of $5000-15000 that will never be paid back, free cars, home appliances, student loans paid off, jobs at the family business etc. It never ends!

I don’t care about my parent’s money. I’ve always assumed they’ll spend it all at the end on health care and I’ve planned accordingly. If there’s an inheritance I’ll be pleasantly surprised but won’t need the money. But I’m pretty sure my brothers and sisters are just coasting through life, assuming they’ll get rich when mom and dad die. So glad I’m a stubborn SOB! I’ll be fine either way.

#61 Eat a Bullet on 03.13.18 at 7:30 pm

I would rather eat a bullet than be a burden on my family. Perhaps it’s time for a long canoe ride. Things we thing about in the North.

#62 Suburban Guy on 03.13.18 at 7:30 pm

Don’t be fooled. P of A who are not family may also have conflicts of interest. Been through it myself with a joint P of A from a small town who golfed with the lawyer who disclosed personal info to a third party. This P of A was also the retired bank manager who hired the financial advisor who put an 85 y o woman who’d never invested in equities, into common stock mutual funds in the fall of 2007. It was a typical small incestuous town. The relationship with his “friends” were more important than his legal obligationsw. Anyways the OBSI awarded all her losses. The lawyer can no longer serve on any boards of directors.

#63 Dolce Vita on 03.13.18 at 7:31 pm

Like many here have said, I did the right thing too and piece of mind for it.

Dad went fast.

Mom took years, I took care of her and when it came to her health being endangered when I was not home, well, then I was forced to put her in a top notch 24/7 care facility which she needed by then and I bridged the financial gap between what she got in pension money and what the facility charged, then $4k/mo.

Last paragraph you wrote was my motto. Never counted on getting a penny from my parents, nor did I want their money upon death and glad I planned it that way.

Nice pull at your heart strings post today Garth.

After all, what comes around, goes around.

#64 Steve-O on 03.13.18 at 7:33 pm

There is nothing more sad than when a family members death is not tragic, its bloody mercy (their condition before death was the tragedy). And then the tragic cherry on top is its probably what you have to look forward too.

That’s my motivation for early retirement, while living life to the fullest now.

#65 A J on 03.13.18 at 7:35 pm

Money, the great corruptor.

You all should watch “Dirty Money” on Netflix.

#66 Suburban Guy on 03.13.18 at 7:37 pm

Why would anyone trust a lawyer to handle the P of A or Executor. The one my aunt had would just visit at her home, have a coffee and send a bill to me. Do you know how hard it is to fight a crooked legal bill like this? Fortunately, it was only a couple thousand, but I put him through the wringer for it.

Only met one truly honest lawyer in my 61 years. There’s a reason for lawyer jokes.

#67 Tony on 03.13.18 at 7:38 pm

Brain-dead offspring… Gee I wonder if it would make sense to donate at least 50 percent of that money to avoid probate fees? If the two could be trusted by their own mother and the two could trust each other that figure could jump up to 80 to 90 percent.

Probate fees are miniscule unless your last name is Bezos. – Garth

#68 For those about to flop... on 03.13.18 at 7:38 pm

I’m not sure how much longer my Father is going to live.

After he passes ,I will try to find out if my Mother has enough to survive.

My brother will Hoover up all the rest.

I will remain in Canada living in exile…

M43BC

#69 Lost...but not leased on 03.13.18 at 7:52 pm

Great article Garth…very important…as many will inevitably be in position on either side of the “WILL”

I will comment in upcoming post….other GF poster will recall my past posts on this topic..and especially “COMMITTEESHIP”

I lost my father in 2015…my mother’s funeral was one month ago, and named EXECUTOR for both.

#70 Ryan on 03.13.18 at 7:52 pm

I can only speak for BC care homes, but have a number of years of experience dealing with them. Here’s what I’ve found.

Residential (24-hr) care in gov-run facilities:
-Income-based monthly rate. Rate is capped at roughly $3000/month. The less your loved one earns, the better. Those paying the full amount can’t escape it; is often because of multiple pensions, survivor’s benefits, etc. And whatever you do, be mindful of tax implications of cashing investments in loved one’s name while in res care. That’s potential income. His/her rate the following year will be hiked.
-Lots of staff. Abundance of RNs. Staffing is rarely an issue.
-Food quality is. In the BC Interior, for instance, most meals are made centrally in Vernon and shipped frozen to various facilities to be reheated. If you remember the TV show M*A*S*H, it often looks like slop on a metal tray in a mess tent.
-Often older, darker, run-down facilities
-In gov-run facilities, your family member may need to share a (large) room with up to three other people.

Residential care (24-hr) in private facility:
-Fewer staff; often the legal minimum. Short-staffing is a recurring problem as many staff prefer shifts with gov facilities, as the latter pays $3-5 more per hour. Expect lots of sick days taken on long weekends, meaning your loved one could be waiting 10-20 minutes for help to the toilet.
-But… usually private room.
-Also, food is good. Made fresh on site in facility’s own kitchen.
-Usually newer, brighter facilities
-Private rate is indeed roughly $5000/month, BUT in BC a private facility must allocate 10% of their beds to gov as a condition of their licence.

The best case for your loved one in BC, then, is to hope for a gov bed (thus, income based, partially-taxpayer-subsidized) in a private facility.

#71 Guillaume on 03.13.18 at 7:53 pm

I saw my parents struggling to find a place for their parents that had no pension, no wealth, nothing and it was sad and cost a lot.
Today I think about the number of people that have no money, no pension, and not too much family also.
I don’t know how we, as a community, are going to handle that …. It is the duty of a country to take care of its Elder, and when you see how indebted our governments are (at any level) and how they cheerfully take some more debt… A lot of misery will be added to misery, so sad… Ontario pays 12 billion dollars in interest every year, imagine that amount used for facility cares or medical support !

#72 Surf city on 03.13.18 at 7:55 pm

#46 Whatcha Minnie on 03.13.18 at 7:07 pm

Today I drank coffee, forwarded mailing address, changed locks at old house, replaced thermostat, touched up painted my uncles bathroom, and sealed up the return air area underneath the air handler in a garage that was open to the underside of the bathtub and open to the attic. Also picked up bonded pine to stain tomorrow for my wife’s bakers rack we painted awhile back. Today was a good day.
..

I drank even more beer today. My day was gooder. Ride the waves of life.

#73 Ed. on 03.13.18 at 7:55 pm

#52 tccontrarian on 03.13.18 at 7:14 pm
Whatcha Minnie on 03.13.18 at 7:07 pm
Do you have a purpose in life other than being a freakin nuisance???
TCC
————
TCC, I like what you write and you are certainly entitled to your opinion of his work, and it took me awhile to get it.

I can’t express it, but I see something deeper, a kind of poetry for a lost generation. I don’t know exactly what it is, or why it moves me as much as it does, but it is beautifully written. It projects a calmness and sense of purpose that I think we can all benefit from. Seriously, and no, I’m not high.

Check out the videos of Bob Ross, a landscape painter who did PBS shows way back. His paintings are crap but his monologue is like listening to a Buddhist chant in technicolour. For once, and only this once, I am not kidding.

#74 Tony on 03.13.18 at 7:56 pm

Re: #42 young & foolish on 03.13.18 at 6:55 pm

It doesn’t sound right to me.

#75 Danny on 03.13.18 at 7:59 pm

Garth……very important blog today…for Nolan and your readers.

The highlight………”It’s not your money. You earned none of it, so anticipate nothing. ”

Some children unfortunately believe they have ” birth rights to an inheritance ” …..even those who stay away when their parents are sick and in need.

Only those who have gone through being primary helper…..in an unbalanced amount of care between siblings….will understand.

Sorry but I found out the hard way…..as the primary care giver.

The question is whether one can still believe in those family values when the parents were alive and understand the importance of them after the parents are gone …despite the fights with the sibling who was not there for the tough times.

#76 Ace Goodheart on 03.13.18 at 7:59 pm

Old age is not kind.

Not sure if anyone has noticed, but it continues to be mega sale month in the Canadian equities market. As this is a finance blog I felt the need to point that out.

Been loading up with such dividend greats as Enbridge, Brookfield and Interpipeline at ridiculously low prices. Many more of my favourites, unaffordable and over priced just six months ago, are now over sold and almost being given away.

As usual, since we are headed into a bear market, all of a sudden solid, well run companies that have been in existence for decades, are suddenly apparently worthless and everyone is dumping shares for whatever they can get.

I’ve been on here for a while posting stuff. So I’ll say it again (and again, and again). High stock prices, mean you sell and re-balance your holdings into bonds and fixed. Low stock prices mean you buy. It is not human nature to buy into a declining stock market. But it is the only way to get wealthy by purchasing equities.

#77 akashic record on 03.13.18 at 8:01 pm

#48 Smoking Man on 03.13.18 at 7:11 pm

Been there done that. I’ll drive a rental car off a cliff before I put my kids through that shit.

I got cliff picked out already…

I sympathize with the Japanese way… picking your hill and forest…

#78 Nonplused on 03.13.18 at 8:02 pm

Hmm, today I actually disagree with a bit of the advice.

Using rough numbers, $600,000/$6000 per month (yikes!) yields 100 months or 8.3 years, which makes mom 91 before the funds run out. Could she live that long? Yes. Is it likely? No. And that is assuming no interest.

Instead of a “balanced” portfolio, which hardly benefits mom, these boys should indeed move the money out of the “high interest” account, but into a conservative portfolio not a balanced one. Even if it generates 3-4% after fees it’ll extend the years it can support mom considerably. No need to gamble on stocks other than blue chip preferred shares. The primary purpose of this money is to look after mom at this point, not to generate growth.

That is about the sum of my disagreement.

It’s good for the boys too, because the last thing they want is for mom to run out of money. If she does, where is the $6000/month going to come from? Well, they are going to have to pony up. Who has that kind of money? If they don’t have really good jobs where they can each come up with $3000/month of after-tax money they don’t otherwise have a use for they will be using a HELOC and paying it back for years.

Oh sorry one more disagreement: Inheritance is a bit of a “right”. It’s the flip-side of the gamble that as a child you might be on the hook for that $6000/month if mom runs out of money. But to be prepared to take the money if mom dies before she runs out of money means you are morally obligated to pony up if she doesn’t. That’s sort of how the deal works and also why you don’t head for the old age home without having saved a whole lot of money.

The advice on POA and executor is spot on. Children make terrible attorneys and executors, not only because they haven’t ever done it before but also because it’s a lot of work and they have conflicts of interest. It’s better to hire a lawyer who does that kind of stuff. Sure, it’s expensive, but it ain’t no $6000/month.

I have personally made my lawyer both my POA and executor. He’s pretty slow, he’s busy, but so far in all other transactions I’ve had with him he’s been pretty good and the fees were as discussed in advance. I don’t think he could do otherwise because for him being disbarred would be a fate of inconsiderable consequences. They may as well throw him in jail. Which is also possible.

Ok, stop reading here the next section is just me whining about the train wreck that is coming to my family in 10 years or so similar to this one.

My parents and my siblings are doing everything they can to burn down my dad’s retirement savings in it seems as short of a time as is possible. That worries me because I know that every time my dad plugs a budget deficit for one of my siblings it means he has less money for himself. What happens when he runs out? I’m the only one that doesn’t ask him for money (because I don’t need to) so when he runs out it follows that I’ll be the only one that might be able to help him. But I just simply don’t have no $12,000 a month in after tax money to pay for their care (my mom will need it too) should they run out of money subsidizing my siblings. So it frustrates me to no end that my siblings are burning through my dad’s (and mom’s) money because they make life choices they cannot fund. I don’t talk to them unless I have to because every single thing they say just frustrates me. I know who’s going to be expected to indirectly pay the bill for every car my dad buys my sister. She’s not good for the money. Not now, and not when my dad needs help either. So I am buying her the damn car. Sorry, I don’t have that kind of money.

The frustration goes well beyond this. My dad also bought my sister a house and it’s still in his name (has to be he’s paying the mortgage. Imagine having a mortgage when you are in your 70’s!!!) Worse, she’s moved some guy I have never met and thus couldn’t warn off in there. What happens if my dad dies and as executor I have to tell them the house is getting sold, so either pony up and buy it or you are evicted! Imagine having to say this to your own sister!! And there are kids involved too! Grandkids! So sure they should benefit from my dad’s estate but this front-running means my kids won’t. If I were to try and distribute my father’s assets equitably among all his grandkids, I’d have to sell the house my sister is living in and kick some kids to the curb. I don’t want anything to do with that so I asked him to take me off the will. That means I won’t be the executor, won’t get any inheritance, but also feel I am not obligated to backstop any lack of money when it comes time to put them in a home. Will I actually not put any money in? Not one penny more than my siblings do.

Anyway there is an important parenting lesson in all of this. If you give one child a dollar because they need it, you have to give all of your children a dollar even if they don’t need it. “Need” is a funny word. What do you “need”? Who doesn’t “need” money? Anyway about the worst thing you can do as a parent is treat certain children preferentially. May as well cook a bomb for Christmas rather than a turkey.

#79 Argh on 03.13.18 at 8:07 pm

Man, this hits home. Dad passed on at 74 after fighting mental illness and then dementia for years after that, and now my mom is living with the big dreaded ‘A’ at 81. I do have a joint POA with my sister and my brother is executor of the will. Luckily, we’re all reasonable and rationale, so no problems thus far and I have full confidence that this will continue to be the case. I feel sorry for those families who cannot find common ground.

#80 Trees are my Friends on 03.13.18 at 8:09 pm

#66 Ed. on 03.13.18 at 7:55 pm

#52 tccontrarian on 03.13.18 at 7:14 pm
Whatcha Minnie on 03.13.18 at 7:07 pm
Do you have a purpose in life other than being a freakin nuisance???
TCC
————
TCC, I like what you write and you are certainly entitled to your opinion of his work, and it took me awhile to get it.

I can’t express it, but I see something deeper, a kind of poetry for a lost generation. I don’t know exactly what it is, or why it moves me as much as it does, but it is beautifully written. It projects a calmness and sense of purpose that I think we can all benefit from. Seriously, and no, I’m not high.

Check out the videos of Bob Ross, a landscape painter who did PBS shows way back. His paintings are crap but his monologue is like listening to a Buddhist chant in technicolour. For once, and only this once, I am not kidding.
…..

Personally I find the Bob Ross Chia pet gets me through a tough day.

https://www.amazon.com/Chia-CP493-01-Pet-Bob-Ross/dp/B073C95WTN

#81 TRON on 03.13.18 at 8:13 pm

I lived on and off in southeast Asia for 3 years. Spent time in big cities and rural areas. Old people are respected there and as a westerner it was obvious to me that the reason was simple. It’s the culture to take care of family no matter what age and to care for others who are not your family because it is the way you were raised.

Here in the west old people get forgotten and their wisdom is rarely solicited. Here in Canada it’s evident where we have an idealistic compassionate intellectual believing he’s smart enough to legislate social change. Poor Justin knows little yet wields a lot with the keys to the bank. Doubt he’s listened much as he’s always too busy talking and making the same speeches about equality in a country where it’s not really needed.

Back to old people. Listen to them. They may not all be smart but they can be very wise. It’s their wisdom that has more value than the money they leave you. Not sure what the stats are but I’d guess inheritance money gets spent the same way as any other dollar passing through the next generations hand. If you earned it you’ve got a much better chance of making it turn into more.

#82 Lost...but not leased on 03.13.18 at 8:19 pm

Re Executor:

As I was named Executor for my Father’s estate…the funeral home (in Metro Vancouver) also provided excellent advice/service on the more mundane post- funeral facets.ie “will search”….”death certificate”..etc.

We were referred to a lawyer specializing in estates.
IMHO, working with the lawyer while an executor has been a valuable learning experience(…if you are the type that likes to learn..) and also I can discuss my what I’ve learned with others.

Our lawyer referred us to an accountant….again excellent service. We dealt with such issues as the family recreational property and how to deal with “capital gains”.

In BC,the Executor can claim between 3-5% of the estate value. While I was tempted..after some number crunching I realized as a beneficiary, it wasn’t worth it..ie I would be taxed on amounts that would otherwise not be..ie “Executor fee” is taxable income.

Otherwise..if you do not want to be executor, make it clear to other parties , but PLEASE don’t allow other parties you don’t trust…BAD. If you are named Executor, you can apply for renunciation.

#83 Trojan House on 03.13.18 at 8:21 pm

Sad story about Stan Lee, the creator of Marvel Comics. Similar situation as he gets older (in his 90s). Turns out people managing his money, have been siphoning it away for their own good.

Not to mention his only daughter has apparently been spending it left, right and centre.

Poor guy is near bankruptcy apparently. There are some really despicable human beings out there.

#84 akashic record on 03.13.18 at 8:24 pm

It is more simple to die if you don’t have enough money for the system to care to keep you alive.

Probably also a more humane experience.

#85 gfd on 03.13.18 at 8:26 pm

Luxury home sales in the Greater Toronto Area and Hamilton have fallen by almost 60 per cent year-over-year, according to a RE/MAX report. The real estate company says 76 freehold and condominium properties in the GTA sold for more than $3 million between Jan. 1 and Feb. 28, down from 180 sales during the same period last year. In Oakville, six homes in the same price range sold early this year, compared to 15 a year ago. Homes priced above $1 million in Hamilton-Burlington saw a 55-per-cent drop to 59 homes sold at the start of the year from 133 in 2017.

http://www.680news.com/2018/03/13/luxury-home-sales/

#86 cguild on 03.13.18 at 8:33 pm

Great post, see why I come for more almost every day.
Mom is 97 dad 94 half brother 64 who are all living at home. how lucky can one be.they have just given up on internet but are ready for a phone call anytime. This post really hits home . thanks again for your steady and informative information also early Birthday wishes to you

#87 Ed. on 03.13.18 at 8:37 pm

#80 Trees are my Friends on 03.13.18 at 8:09 pm
Personally I find the Bob Ross Chia pet gets me through a tough day.
https://www.amazon.com/Chia-CP493-01-Pet-Bob-Ross/dp/B073C95WTN
*******

I would snap up a bunch at only $11 but on Amazon.ca it’s $55! The only cheaper one is called the “Chia Freedom of Choice Planter”. Be a witness to the inequality inherent in the system here:

https://www.amazon.ca/Chia-Donald-Freedom-Pottery-Planter/dp/B01G988ZRG

#88 earthboundmisfit on 03.13.18 at 8:37 pm

Good piece today …. kudos.

#89 Interstellar Old Yeller on 03.13.18 at 8:44 pm

Good reminder to talk this over with my parents. I think they may have appointed septuagenarian friends (the same age as them) to handle their affairs, which solves the problem of bickering kids, so long as the friends can actually still handle the responsibilities. My parents have been very secretive, which is fine so long as they understand that we may be left guessing what they would have wanted if they refuse to tell us in advance.

So, ask. – Garth

#90 JP Superstarry (today) on 03.13.18 at 8:47 pm

#202 James on 03.13.18 at 9:44 am
#187 JP Superstar on 03.13.18 at 8:35 am
#172 Flat Earth Society on 03.13.18 at 2:24 am
#160 JP Superstar (yesterday)
First off, I never said sending 18 year old kids to war was conscientious. That was a horrible straw man argument and your rhetoric license is revoked.
***********
…..What I don’t know approaches infinity, ..
……………………………………………………………..
Best explanation https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/significance-e-mc-2-means/
Personally I’m looking for FTL via the Alcubierre metric
*********

Personally, I know Miguel Alcubierre, and he was on peyote when he dreamt up hyperlight drive. So stop beating yourself over the head with Peterson’s 12 Commandments, or all your stuffing will fall out and you won’t be able to make the trip.

#91 Trumpocalypse2018 on 03.13.18 at 8:48 pm

2 Days to the Ides of March !!

The last sane and intelligent guy has been booted out of the White House.

Pompeo “would be the secretary of war, not state.”

https://www.vanityfair.com/news/2018/03/rex-tillerson-donald-trump-state-department

UK and Russia about to go head to head.

Iran and the Saudis gearing up.

More overnight, stay tuned.

PREPARE.

#92 espressobob on 03.13.18 at 9:01 pm

Why not write your will to something constructive for a cause you believe in, so when you kick you know the proceeds will do just that.

That will be your legacy.

#93 8102 on 03.13.18 at 9:01 pm

Well said Mr. Turner, we often forget the sacrifices our parents make for us.

#94 Jaw-Jaw not War-War on 03.13.18 at 9:02 pm

#91 Trumpocalypse2018 on 03.13.18 at 8:48 pm
2 Days to the Ides of March !!….
The last sane and intelligent guy has been booted out of the White House.
Pompeo “would be the secretary of war, not state.”
PREPARE

********
Mindless fear mongerer!
Anybody here from Pickering with some spare iodine pills they don’t need? Maybe your parent’s?

#95 John on 03.13.18 at 9:02 pm

Trumpocalypse2018

Were you not Trumpocalypse 2016 AND 2017?

Go get a life….

#96 Brian1 on 03.13.18 at 9:03 pm

Scary post today. Worth talking about.

As for Remax, they claim 60% off for luxury homes.I think that they are looking for suckers to buy them. I say wait five years when houses will drop 60%.

#97 Financial Orchid on 03.13.18 at 9:14 pm

I’m proud to say I was able to act with integrity and in the best interest of someone else even as PoA and the Exec even when I didn’t understand the role fully when I agreed. The most we can do is be there for the other person until the end and to honor their wishes to the best of one’s ability.

#98 LilyJoe~ on 03.13.18 at 9:15 pm

Very nicely ended Garth. Thank you.

#99 Smoking Man on 03.13.18 at 9:21 pm

UK about to explode. They drawing up plans to imprison for 15 years anyone that vists altetnative websites like Bribert or Info Wars.

Globalist in an all out panic not realizing a move like this will infuriate a lot of people. London will burn if this goes through.

What it boils down to. Globalist want to send a strong message they are still in charge. Kind of like Wynee thinking she gets another crack a destroying Ontario. Some more. She won’t even win her own ridding. Lots of Dr and business owners there. That’s why T2 delayed the income sprinkling till 2019 hoping Wynne could do it.
Further proof Libralism is not founded on reality. It’s a mental disorder.

On another note Trump appoints for the first time in history a woman to head the CIA. MSM. Dead Silence..

Dr Smoking Man
PhD Herdonomics

#100 Leo Trollstoy on 03.13.18 at 9:30 pm

FYI German Alois Alzheimer credited with discovering the disease that bears his name

Imagine once a locally prestigious name… his patients prolly called him Dr Alzheimer now, a century later, nobody wants to touch it…

#101 dr. talc on 03.13.18 at 9:31 pm

Once the State (social, healthcare workers) make a determination of someone’s ‘competence’, it’s over for the family. If a family member isn’t named on title and bank accounts : kiss everything goodbye.

#102 Leo Trollstoy on 03.13.18 at 9:33 pm

It’s not your money. You earned none of it, so anticipate nothing. When a parent struggles and needs help at the end of the day, extend it freely. Spend it all on their behalf. Be selfless and giving. Treat him or her as you would wish to be treated. That is your inheritance.

Powerful

#103 acdel on 03.13.18 at 9:33 pm

Well said Garth, been through it myself.

As others stated when my time comes it will be my decision, no one else!

#104 TheSecretCode on 03.13.18 at 9:35 pm

BoC is going to stall raising rates…they have some wiggle room…and they are using it due to how many refinances are occurring this year. Maybe one late in the year. The US will go, maybe 4 times this year…

Carole James says if you are a BCer and own a property that is not a principle residence in BC and don’t rent them out you will pay the Speculators Tax. Last week when I asked, James said broadly it was something being looked at…

Looks like BC speculators are going to get it. And the wording initially said a rebate on the tax return after paying the speculation tax…a rebate is not the same as being exempt, meaning tax money out of your pocket.

#105 young & foolish on 03.13.18 at 9:38 pm

“High stock prices, mean you sell and re-balance your holdings into bonds and fixed. Low stock prices mean you buy. It is not human nature to buy into a declining stock market. But it is the only way to get wealthy by purchasing equities.”

Ace makes some encouraging remarks!

#106 NotLegalAdvice on 03.13.18 at 9:44 pm

Wow, deep post.

Garth, I could not agree more with this statement: “appointing multiple, equal POAs is probably a dumb idea” .

You need to really sit down and think of these things before you get to a state where a POA (Power of Attorney(s))is forced on you via court order.

Let’s take it back to 3rd year law school, back to Estates Law. A POA, as most people don’t know, does not replace a will.

A POA is only active while an individual is living…alive!

There are 2 types of POA’s, 1 is for Health Care and one is for Property.

Please speak to a lawyer if you don’t understand the difference between the two.

Once an individual dies, the POA is not longer in force, this is when the Will kicks in.

Anyways, that one brother is a d**k. But it really doesn’t surprise me anymore. There will always be a greater fool.

#107 Lost...but not leased on 03.13.18 at 9:45 pm

Contrasting tales of elder care: My experience

My parents were divorced…

My Dad passed away in 2015.
He had a form of cancer, but was able to live at home till the end with care workers visiting 3 times a day. (***I do have issues as to his demise being “assisted”….ie he was given morphine at a hospice and died 10 minutes later.)

My mother?..lived alone..we had noticed her mind was slipping a bit …till one day she ended up in hospital having fell in her home (her brother found her).

She had injured herself, but the MD’s diagnosed she had dementia (2014)and no longer able to live alone. Once a “bed” became available in a Senior’s home, she would be moved there.

My sibling and I (BOTH were POA’s)scouted out some homes…then lo and behold…I get a call my Mother has been placed in a home I hadn’t checked out.
THIS IS WHERE SHTF….

I visited my Mother….and she was extremely agitated.
My mothers “room” was decorated with items from her home, so she was on alert aka WHY ARE THESE HERE?
I walked through the home, and while the home was relatively new and nicely decorated, I could already see problems. My mother’s dementia was basically short term memory..and she was reasonably fit…..whilst other seniors in her wing were quite severe in both mental and physical handicaps…literal vegetables…making my mother feel even further alone and isolated.

In addition, I found the staff TERRIBLE..if one needed help the staff were often hiding in obscure areas on their cell phones. Other homes I visited were a marked contrast to this one.

For this alleged “home”…my mother was paying $6500/month. What about my POA ?…equal?…well apparently if (2) are named as POA…one POA can act alone with no real legal consequences..its that loosey goosey.

In mid 2017, my mother was transferred to another facility via she was on a waiting list for a “funded bed”, which implies the Gov’t pays 20% of the bed cost based on annual income (my mother had GIC’s), not the principal. I found this facility was much better staffed than previous one, and quality of staff much better.

However, in reflection, I found the rooms in both homes not much different than jail cells…..very spartan, almost depressing. The going rate works out to approx. $200/day.

Some may seriously consider trying to accomodate these parties in their own home. I am not aware of how the Gov’t has “needs” tests, as many seniors may not have means, but must somehow be accomadated.

This begets the question as to how well off seniors can claim poverty and avoid full payment …..OR conversely, is it fair people who scrimped and saved all their life have to pay full shot in seniors homes ?

Usual lesson..do you homework (and beware of the minefield).

#108 westcoast on 03.13.18 at 9:45 pm

45 yo now. Have decided to book into Dignatas in Switzerland when needed.

#109 genbizx on 03.13.18 at 9:50 pm

Well said, Garth.

#110 Elcaminokid on 03.13.18 at 9:53 pm

Long time lurker and have not post in the past…but this post rings home. Love this blog and have read it daily for years now. My parents are also “coming of age”. I have already expressed, and my sister has too to my mom and pops. Spend what you have now. We do not want a single cent from them and my sis feels the same. This is their final hour in their life journey and they should spend what they saved. It is not my hard work or my sisters hard work. It is there money. It should be their enjoyment while they still have a sane mind.”Once a man twice a child” rings a bell.Be safe folks!

#111 Walter Safety on 03.13.18 at 9:53 pm

This whole article is a bit of a stretch.
“Get a independent POA “ I don’t think so ,they can’t lose money or beneficiaries can sue them .There goes your balanced portfolio investments unless you can market time death.
And while we’re at it what’s to gain for taking a risk ?The after fees spread from a 1.5 % Gic to balanced portfolio is maybe 3.5 % so $20k a year on $600k . For how long? Nursing home life expectancy less than 3 years on average.
Try explaining to a court that Mom accumulated the money using GIC’s but that wasn’t good enough to keep her.

#112 Big Kahuna on 03.13.18 at 9:59 pm

#99Smoking-it is actually sad what has happened to the once great country of Britain. The irony is they fought back Hitler’s bombing raids and the ideology of Hitler is winning anyway.

#113 Elcaminokid on 03.13.18 at 10:05 pm

Actually I am a little uneasy about “death money” …It is not mine…

#114 cultural elitist on 03.13.18 at 10:09 pm

“Spend it all on their behalf. Be selfless and giving. Treat him or her as you would wish to be treated. That is your inheritance.”

That’s beautifully said Garth. Thank you for encouraging people to take the high road.

I’m actually glad that my parents have very little, so there will be no incentive for selfish behaviour over a fresh grave. Rather, we get to argue about positive things, like who is being more generous while they are alive! ;-) Meager compensation – there are no winners when siblings are small-minded.

#115 stage1dave on 03.13.18 at 10:17 pm

Bravo Mr.Turner…you are having one hell of a week!

Your post touched a nerve…I’ve been there a couple times, but TG it didn’t get too tangled up. My mother, after a short on again/off again battle with dementia died with basically nothing (other than, believe it or not, a small inheritance from a relative who predeceased her) but enuff to look after final expenses, pay off the CCs, and leave my sister and I a small grubstake.

Dad had remarried decades ago, so we weren’t involved directly. except to watch him “age out” from long distance whilst hearing second-hand stories about his ongoing battle with this reality thingie…but my mom would do that too; sometimes I’d visit and she wouldn’t know who I was! Btw, dad chose to stay at home while still lucid, but that couldn’t have been easy on my step-mom, step-brother, or him. (although it was undoubtedly cheaper) He lasted about a year.

C’est la vie…I consider myself lucky that I’m from a generation that wasn’t hiding out in the basement until my parents bought me a house. (OK, that’s the only shot I’m takin’ at moisters this year) Neither myself nor my sister ever expected anything inheritance-wise; it wasn’t something we ever thought about.

Anyway, the paradigm has apparently shifted I guess…my wife and I frequently have coffee at the MIL’s acreage and this inheritance bit is a pretty frequent topic…between her family, of course. (it’s my cue to head outside for a smoke, btw, or play with the yard cats) Wife’s an executor, which after reading this column is raising some goosebumps…my only concern would be backing her up, btw; I’ve got no direct financial interest.

There’s several brothers involved on the wife’s side, and of course mom wants to leave them “something”. Nobody actively solicits my opinion (except wifey) and we figure mommy should sell the acreage and use the proceeds to buy in town. And use the rest to enjoy whats left of her life…it’s her cash, after all.

Anyhow, same story here as yer post…land/house paid for, whatever cash lying around is in GIC’s, savings accts paying nuthin’, etc…must be a generational thing. (she’s 75, btw) Drives rarely, and movin a bit slow thanx to knee surgery last year.

Wife and I have discussed buying her place for ourselves (or simply buying it and renting it out) to smooth out the process, but that will create problems with a couple of the brothers who…umm…aren’t currently employed (and haven’t been for a while) but are camped out. Strangely, MIL worries if she sells out “the boys will have nowhere to go”.

(I will studiously avoid broadcasting my opinion about the preceeding familial behaviour on this forum)

Or hell, wifey and I could just buy a place in town and chuck her (the MIL, not the wife) in the basement.

I actually haven’t thought about this for a while…now I’m totally depressed…money and family truly do not mix…even if it’s someone else’s family!

No wonder I’d rather be working under a car or slingin’ t shirts…

#116 just a dude on 03.13.18 at 10:17 pm

Garth,

Awesome post. Thank you. I completely agree with you on all points.

I’ve been there with my Mom as well, also with the dreaded A disease. Nothing can prepare you for that. Nothing.

#117 Pete on 03.13.18 at 10:20 pm

What this article does not clarify is that Canadian seniors with low income are provided with subsidized housing and health care without question. My dad was a veteran, came home wounded (disabled), and was unable to work. He never had savings and his pension was minimum wage, but he had an ok subsidized, but small, 1 bdrm apartment to his death. His many health issues were taken care of through access centres.

My father-in-law, on the other hand, who had a good job and golden pension does not qualify for subsidies. He pays $4k/mth for his residence plus health care, plus, plus. But he has money in the bank and can afford it…invest IF you have it.

This story today is about scammer children, and not whether Canada takes care of its seniors. Nobody in Canada should be on the streets unless they drink or inject their money away!

#118 Elcaminokid on 03.13.18 at 10:22 pm

I am not wanting “Death Money” I survive on my own and create my own wealth. Wishing and hoping my mom and pops spend it while they can. I do not want a single cent from them. They have spent enough to bring me into this world…and yes I rent after being trapped in a house for the last 16 years. I am free , and it is a nice good feel!!

#119 akashic record on 03.13.18 at 10:29 pm

#99 Smoking Man

Trump appoints for the first time in history a woman to head the CIA. MSM. Dead Silence.

—-

It’s not the same as the first female president.
Plus, “it was her turn”.

#120 Andrew Woburn on 03.13.18 at 10:35 pm

Hmmm.

– Tesla Treasurer and VP of Finance Leaves the Company

I wish Elon Musk no ill but I wish he could focus. Henry Ford didn’t build railways in his spare time.

https://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2018-03-13/tesla-treasurer-and-vp-of-finance-is-said-to-leave-the-company

#121 BG on 03.13.18 at 10:35 pm

I really don’t understand how you can hope for inheritance money.

Is it that I’m too young? My parents too poor? Have a decent family?
I just don’t get it.

If anything, one of the reasons I want to make more money is for my parents to enjoy it.

#122 Andrew Woburn on 03.13.18 at 10:42 pm

friend to cats on 03.13.18 at 5:36 pm
Sometimes you post stories better left untold. This is one of them, shame on the brother.
===================

No. People need to face reality. I have sent a copy to my wife who has appointed her self absorbed daughter as executor. She is always broke and fighting with her mom. There are also two brothers in the mix.

I have told her that she can not expect a duty of care from the daughter and the ensuing fights over her and money will break up the kids. A professional executor is not cheap but will probably save untold grief for everyone.

#123 Gravy Train on 03.13.18 at 10:42 pm

#99 Smoking Man on 03.13.18 at 9:21 pm
“Globalist[s are] in an all-out panic[,] not realizing a move like this will infuriate a lot of people…. Globalist[s] want to send a strong message they are still in charge.”

What are you yipping about? Do you even know?

You do know that in most contexts globalism refers to global capitalism, not communism, right? You do know that Garth is not a protectionist or nativist, right? And that he’s not a Trump supporter, right? You do know that, right? Why are you commenting on this Web site?

#124 Rational Observer on 03.13.18 at 10:52 pm

“It’s not your money. You earned none of it, so anticipate nothing.”

Which is why inheritances should be taxed, rather than labor. Nice to know you agree.

#125 Elcaminokid on 03.13.18 at 10:56 pm

My uncle had made me POA recently in the past year..He does not trust his own son…disturbing really! I honestly did not expect that phone call. What have we become as a society and a country. Be safe out there!

#126 Keith in Rio on 03.13.18 at 11:05 pm

I don’t know what it “really” costs for care in Ontario, but my gut tells me these brothers didn’t shop around very well.

I am the POA and executor for 92 year old father who has dementia, and is living on the special needs floor of a nursing home. He has 24 hour care, and all the amenities of life in his private suite that I would want for myself, if it was me in his place.

$2,200 a month, all in.

It is not publicly subsidized, as he makes too much money from his pension.

#127 kg on 03.13.18 at 11:07 pm

After a long time I agree with you on something…your last line ! BRAVO !!!

#128 John Dough on 03.13.18 at 11:10 pm

#48 Smoking Man on 03.13.18 at 7:11 pm
Been there done that. I’ll drive a rental car off a cliff before I put my kids through that shit.
**********

Why rent when you can buy instead?

#129 Mark's Mom & Dad (retired) on 03.13.18 at 11:23 pm

#56 Mark on 03.13.18 at 7:21 pm
Around here, full level long-term care costs the taxpayers between $120k and $160k/year, not including long-term capital costs.

Basically its getting to the point here that taxes are almost being directly shoveled straight from the pockets of the young and into supporting the old. 
***********

Mark will be out of the office for awhile. We decided to splurge and send him and a few of his Optimist Club pals to Japan on a heli-tour of Mt Shinmoedake. The pictures don’t do it justice:

http://www.bbc.com/news/world-asia-43356337

#130 Pete from St. Cesaire on 03.13.18 at 11:33 pm

Sorry for your loss, Garth.

Side note, nothing riles me up more than hearing stories about family members that feel entitled to an inheritance. Especially distant family members that preach that ‘blood is thicker than water’, or useless family members that couldn’t give a damn until the will is read.
I’d leave it all to the friendly waitress at the donut shop before I’d leave it to a family member that’s been absent from my life for the last 30 years or some 3rd cousin from B.C. that thinks “he owes it to me; I’m the only blood relative he has left”.

#131 Elcaminokid on 03.13.18 at 11:40 pm

I will take care of my mom and dad….even though they refuse to leave the house…Life is depressing at times…

#132 Vivek on 03.13.18 at 11:41 pm

When my father died in 2013, all wrapped up my brother and I split $3.7 million. From that money alone, my conservatively invested share is now $2.6 million…….My brothers is now close to nothing..Boats.. trips…cars.

Similar to debt addicts, some “folks” just understand money.

I ain’t paying for him.

#133 Arto on 03.13.18 at 11:54 pm

For some reason, most parents have this innate need to leave money for their kids. I tell my mom spend it all and have a good time. I don’t want any of it.

Same way I tell my kids they aren’t getting any of mine.

#134 Oft deleted much maligned stock.picker on 03.13.18 at 11:56 pm

Trudeau’s new dope plan will have the majority of the country shaving a half a moustache as they degenerate into dope addled zombies. Say goodbye to the kids now, before they can seek Oblivion at every opportunity. With financial and social pressures ratcheting up daily I expect more people unfulfilled will seek self medicated solace in dope. Pot turns your brain to goo. Those who insist it’s not a gateway drug didn’t witness the freefall into cocaine and heroin during the smoking sixties when pot had a tenth the content of THC etc. Smoking pot is just practise for the big event….a total loss of your appreciation if reality.

#135 Elcaminokid on 03.13.18 at 11:56 pm

Granparents whom save their 2500 sqft + home for grandkids to spend a night sometimes….what are you thinking?

#136 James Kook on 03.14.18 at 12:01 am

“…memory/brain diseases – dementia, Alzheimer’s – are all about. They’re progressive, incurable, disturbing, relentless”

This is a penalty for too comfortable, and lazy lifestyle.

In the European villages, where I had to live, people actually must work hard and care for themselves to the very end – dementia is very rare. All elders (80+, 90+) have sharp brains (and keen sence of humor)
No one needs a caregiver at all, unless physically injured.

#137 Where's The Money Guido? on 03.14.18 at 12:10 am

Re: #14 Wrk.dover on 03.13.18 at 6:01 pm
Is Poloz a plant from an enemy government?

Or is he just another vegetable on Prozac?
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
https://www.veteranstoday.com/2015/03/10/we-demand-president-putin-release-documents-vital-to-world-peace/

Please ask Mr Putin to include a little Canadian content to spice of the lives of those with cabin fever living in the snow belt. For example, former Liberal PM Jean Cretien kept the RCMP from arresting the Laval professor Hugh Hambleton for spying so the RCMP tipped off the Brits and he was arrested and convicted when he went to England. Unknown is the fact that Hambleton’s sister worked in the office of Pierre Trudeau. She made constant secret trips to Mexico city and then to Havannah during the cold war. What was she doing and how did international Jewery get such a firm grip on Canada during the Trudeau years? What were Maurice Strong and Bob Rae’s brother doing working for Power Corp, the money behind Trudeau, and please detail Mr Strong’s strong relationship with missing American gangster Jimmy Hoffa.

#138 OttawaMike on 03.14.18 at 12:12 am

I’m there with my Mom right now.

Timely advice. Thanks.

#139 jane24 on 03.14.18 at 12:19 am

Got this t-shirt too. Parents were grasshoppers rather than ants all their life so needed govt assistance to pay their care homes. Both in a 5 star private Ontario home where they were lucky enough to get govt paid beds. Dad lived on the tax payer for 8 years. Mum is on year 12 now with both dementia and complex heath needs.

Lesson that have learned from this is to either have nothing at the end or millions because if you are just an average middle class person, it will all go on final heath care.

Yet I have friends in their 60s who have waited all their lives to inherit. They have not accomplished what they could have done with their lives as they didn’t see the point. When that longed for money goes to care homes I shall be hard pressed not to laugh.

These surveys you read all the time about the wave of inherited money coming to my generation are also laughable. Care homes will get the lot.

#140 EdwardBear on 03.14.18 at 12:22 am

My best friend’s Alberta ranch raised Mom, God rest her wonderful soul, called
that ghoulish behaviour “ Waiting for dead men’s boots.”

#141 Cici on 03.14.18 at 12:28 am

Great post today, thanks for bringing up the topic. Although I hope neither of my parents will ever suffer from any of those conditions.

I’d love to see them live actively with great mobility right into their nineties and go peacefully in their sleep when their time finally comes…but without any illness or suffering.

#142 nonconfidencevote on 03.14.18 at 12:31 am

Rest in peace Professor Hawking.

https://www.google.ca/url?url=https://www.cnn.com/2018/03/14/health/stephen-hawking-dead/index.html&rct=j&frm=1&q=&esrc=s&sa=U&ved=0ahUKEwinjJS7_erZAhVO9mMKHVZiBE4QqQIIFzAA&usg=AOvVaw3EiCQmMUFOyhxI-mqZ9NNT

#143 Smoking Man on 03.14.18 at 12:32 am

Jordan Peterson is kicking ass. The lefties have no idea how to deal soft spoken Mr dress up who oozes out logic with people talk with an ocational cool academic word tossed in every now and then to let you know he’s a professor.

Young men who would never pick up book unless the cover had a nice set of spectaculos with bright red lipstick.

He’s turning them away from porn. Telling them to clean there room, life sucks man up and keep trying to be better..

Where I diverge but only from a personal level is his hatred for bozze. Says it destroys people. And he’s probaly right.

But the truth lies at the bottom of every wisky bottle. And if you are a true disaplined truth seeker. I don’t see another way to find it.

Sure I might end up dead in a ditch one day. But to go through life scared of everything. In the end we are all work food.

RIP Steven Hawking . Never believed a thing you said. Too Albert Einstein fake for me.

Nicola Tesla. Now thats how its done.

#144 Smoking Man on 03.14.18 at 12:49 am

Last post meant worm food not work food.

#145 Flat Earth Society on 03.14.18 at 12:55 am

#16 SoggyShorts

Carbon dioxide, or CO2, has gone from just under 300 parts per 1,000,000 in the atmosphere to a little over 400 parts per 1,000,000 since the start of the industrial revolution, and it’ll probably top out at 500 parts per 1,000,000 by the time the fossil age ends. Not enough to get bent out of shape about the atmosphere has had far more than 500 ppm at times in the past. In fact it can go as high as 5,000 parts per million (or 0.5%) and the earth will be just fine, even if we do have to move a few houses inland a bit. There is no Apocalypse coming. Our houses aren’t built to last 100 years anyway, so who cares if we have to move some of them inland or build some Dutch style dykes?

But I think more to the point, and it is a very important point, is that at this point modern society is built on fossil fuels. Everything from you car to your food to the heat in your house to you computer is a product of and runs on fossil fuels. At this point we have no choice but to use them or crawl in the grave. Global warming or not, there is no current alternative that scales. We have no choice, other than to die cold and hungry in the dark.

Will an alternative emerge? Well, let’s hope so and hopefully soon or we will die cold and hungry in the dark regardless that the earth won’t give two hoots about the extra CO2, because fossil fuels will not last forever. They aren’t being made anymore.

#146 So Many... on 03.14.18 at 1:00 am

It’s heartbreaking to see that so many people are suffering from dimentia these days. Dimentia doesn’t care if you were a doctor, engineer or factory worker everyone is fair game. My father died from this terrible disease . Support groups said it’s not generic but learning another language, learning how to play an instrument , crossword puzzles, reading books, playing chess etc. will help to keep your cognitive wheels turning. We can only hope.

#147 Harrison Bergeron on 03.14.18 at 1:15 am

Nobody in Canada should be on the streets unless they drink or inject their money away. Yes, this is what was written above by Pete. Perhaps Smoking Man could respond to Pete’s statement. Let him have it Smokey.

#148 Re: So Many ... on 03.14.18 at 1:22 am

Sorry for the spelling error it should read – Support groups said it’s not “genetic” instead of generic (except for some very rare types).

#149 guru on 03.14.18 at 1:24 am

#85

Working inside the industry, we’ve seen a serious movement from deep pocket investors out of the GTA (markham, downtown TO, oakville, richmond hill areas) in the past 12 months, accelerating in the late 2017 and up until Jan. The smart money has seriously moved out and the ones getting hurt in the end is always the wannabe amateurs …. aka buyers in the past year/this year are the ones left holding the bag.

#150 dosouth on 03.14.18 at 1:26 am

Love thy parents until medical issues and cash us do part. You can’t legislate common sense and you can’t fix stupid. Spend it all before the kids get involved and let the state pay….why not, it’s what the Millennials say is happening anyway (as they ask for a loan from the bank of mom and dad out of the other side of their faces)?

#151 Jamie on 03.14.18 at 2:00 am

Garth, sage advice as usual – thank you. This post has more value than I have ever received from any advisor over 30 years. I owe you a few scotches.

“Finally, kids, expect zero. No legacy, no windfall.”

Aside from your valuable point about the importance of dedicating a person’s own life’s savings to their own well-being in their latter years, and also the fact that people need to make their own way in life without banking on inheritance, it should be noted that there are countless corporations that have built their mission statement around capitalizing on aging boomers and the very tragic predicaments that may lie had of them. The new breed of retirement residences will ensure that they milk every penny out of these people before they die. And people complain about childcare…,

#152 Myra Andrews on 03.14.18 at 2:31 am

Greater Vancouver Housing Stats originally posted by realtor PaulB

March 13 New 277 Sold 159 TI: 8688
March 12 New 327 Sold 139 TI: 8642
March 9 New 139 Sold 91 TI: 8510
March 8 New 196 Sold 118 TI: 8496
March 7 New 204 Sold 99 TI: 8442
March 6 New 246 Sold 130 TI: 8372
March 5 New 316 Sold 104 TI: 8344

#153 Flat Earth Society on 03.14.18 at 2:39 am

Chew on this you all that think you know something:

“Life is a sexually transmitted disease with a 100% mortality rate.”

See if that statement is incorrect. Provide proof.

#154 Lolo on 03.14.18 at 4:09 am

I don’t know what’s changed my thinking in my middle age. In my 20s i didn’t give a F** that my father was going to share title of his house w/ my brothers (chinese tradition to hand things down to the sons). I said to my sister, who was miffed, ‘Who cares, it’s his money, let him do what he wants with it. I’m going to to make my own money!’ Twenty plus years later, pangs of indignation rear up. Particularly when I am changing his diapers. I wish i could genuinely regain the same outlook I did in my 20s. I know the truth in the words of my 20 year old self, but the truth does not always feel fair. And yes, I did make my own money. (Also, not to imply that my brothers don’t take care of our dad. They do, too.)

#155 Howard on 03.14.18 at 6:50 am

#107 Lost…but not leased on 03.13.18 at 9:45 pm

This begets the question as to how well off seniors can claim poverty and avoid full payment …..OR conversely, is it fair people who scrimped and saved all their life have to pay full shot in seniors homes ?

—————————————

This is the question that I ask frequently.

Since poor seniors must be accommodated by the government somehow, isn’t there an incentive for people to gift their savings to their children as they approach their 80s so that by the time they may need access to a care home, there won’t be much left and the government will have to pay for it all?

You might say that that may leave you with a bottom-of-the-barrel facility. Well that’s true but only if you don’t trust your children. As part of the “deal” of gifting the inheritance money in advance, the kids have to be trusted to pitch some of it back in to help pay for a care home above the government minimum.

At the end of the day it’s all about trust between parent and child (or other relative, if the elderly person is childless).

#156 Howard on 03.14.18 at 7:07 am

WTF?
Is Stephen Poloz now a Liberal MP?
Or trying to become one?

http://www.cbc.ca/news/politics/poloz-child-care-quebec-1.4574195?cmp=rss

Bank of Canada head underlines potential of Quebec child care for entire country

#157 Yep on 03.14.18 at 7:16 am

Bang on.

#158 I’m stupid on 03.14.18 at 7:29 am

I’m expecting the next post to include lots of dog pics. This post was very depressing.

#159 Mishuko on 03.14.18 at 7:30 am

This hits a nerve. I know I can act in my parents (or grandparents) best interest. I just have this unnerving gutting feeling something like todays post may happen in my family.

#160 Howard on 03.14.18 at 7:45 am

Doug Ford says he’s open to dropping the foreign buyers’ tax.

This would make Doug more globalist than Kathleen Wynne.

The latest insane twist of Ontario politics, and frustrating for everyone seeking a political option that puts Canadians first.

#161 Steven Rowlandson on 03.14.18 at 8:06 am

Finally, kids, expect zero. No legacy, no windfall.

This adds weight to my point of view which is that without radical reductions in living costs like real estate prices plus more good paying jobs and successful outcomes when it comes to investments the likely hood of economic and demographic implosion are pretty damned good.

#162 maxx on 03.14.18 at 8:09 am

There is no way to mitigate the loss of loved ones. I left my job to look after a terminally ill parent and it was the most worthwhile time I ever spent.

……………………………..

The world has lost Stephen Hawking – 76 light years.
Heaven bless him.

#163 Gravy Train on 03.14.18 at 8:38 am

#143 Smoking Man on 03.14.18 at 12:32 am
“Never believed a thing [Stephen Hawking] said. Too Albert Einstein fake for me.”

Wow, SM, you never cease to amaze me! You really are a dummkopf, aren’t you, Smokey? You’re so much like Trump. Just when I think you (and he) can’t possibly lower the bar any further, you both surprise me with more inanity! I used to point and laugh at Trump’s stupidity, but now I’m just sickened by his arrogance and ignorance! (And yours!)

#164 Pepito on 03.14.18 at 8:47 am

Go and visit one. Then see if you want your mother there. – Garth
—————————–

Garth, your reply above to #30 Howard re public long-term care facilities seems to imply that such facilities are, to put plainly, horrible. If so, your comment speaks volumes about your perspective as a former politician towards the vast majority of Canadians who can not afford the exorbitant fees of private care providers. Don’t all Canadians, regardless of wealth, deserve equal care with dignity in their final years under the health care system Canada provides?

Nowhere did I say public facilities are horrible. They are not. But neither are the ones I have toured happy places. Given a choice, I would not place a relative in such an environment. Yes, we all deserve a dignified exit, but families and individuals also have a responsibility, in the 80 or so years that one is on this earth, to prepare for final days. The state cannot afford to raise your kids or lovingly care for your parents, a reality unlikely to change. – Garth

#165 Bad Cowboy on 03.14.18 at 8:54 am

For all those millenials who voted for a NDP – Liberal mash up of free stuff and dope dope dope.

http://vancouversun.com/

How’s that working out for ya?

#166 Howard on 03.14.18 at 8:56 am

#54 mark on 03.13.18 at 7:18 pm

Sad. I wouldn’t say this is advice, but look into the role of carbs and sugar.

I recently got myself off them and the effect on my brain and mental clarity is astounding. It’s like I’ve been walking around in a fog previously. Not to mention my belt size went in two holes.

———————————–

Alzheimers has been described as a type of “diabetes of the brain”, whereby the uptake of glucose energy in neurons is deficient, leading to cell death. It is also theorized, though not yet proven, that just as high sugar/carbs can lead to Type 2 Diabetes, it also leaves one at far greater risk of developing Alzheimers.

There are a whole bunch of Boomers who spent their entire lives drinking Coke and snacking on doughnuts and are STILL addicted to sugar. I fear for the pressure to be imposed on our health system in about 20 years.

#167 Stavros on 03.14.18 at 9:08 am

Interesting and informative post, Garth. Totally agree with you regarding POA, and thinking very carefully about who you select.

#168 Bad Cowboy on 03.14.18 at 9:09 am

#156 Howard.. yes….bizarre.. what an idea….put every unemployed woman and recent immigrant on the government dime….don’t mind the new bump in taxes….think ….giant Liberal circle jerk. Poloz must be testing the new dope .

#169 dharma bum on 03.14.18 at 9:14 am

I often wonder why humans are so maniacally obsessed with staying alive at all costs, especially after one’s quality of life has deteriorated so badly as to be pointless and useless.

“Some do not understand
that we must die,
But those who do realize this
settle their quarrels.”
~ The Buddha

#170 James on 03.14.18 at 9:16 am

#143 Smoking Man on 03.14.18 at 12:32 am

Jordan Peterson is kicking ass. The lefties have no idea how to deal soft spoken Mr dress up who oozes out logic with people talk with an ocational cool academic word tossed in every now and then to let you know he’s a professor.

Young men who would never pick up book unless the cover had a nice set of spectaculos with bright red lipstick.
He’s turning them away from porn. Telling them to clean there room, life sucks man up and keep trying to be better..
Where I diverge but only from a personal level is his hatred for bozze. Says it destroys people. And he’s probaly right.
But the truth lies at the bottom of every wisky bottle. And if you are a true disaplined truth seeker. I don’t see another way to find it.
Sure I might end up dead in a ditch one day. But to go through life scared of everything. In the end we are all work food.
RIP Steven Hawking . Never believed a thing you said. Too Albert Einstein fake for me.
Nicola Tesla. Now thats how its done.
____________________________________________
Why would you insult Stephan Hawking? What is your infatuation with Telsa? Nikola Tesla was born in the Austrian Empire (present day Croatia) in a village called Smiljan. Although he was an Ethnic Serb he quickly moved to the USA and became an American. Worked with Edison at Westinghouse and created multiple patents. He was a certified genius and inventor however he was a certified looser when it came to business and legal decisions and died destitute in a hotel room by himself.
Your comparison between Einstein, Hawking an Tesla is an uneducated disparaging low mark even for you. Stephan Hawking was a certified genius as well and his understanding of the workings of physics may be what carry’s humans into the nether regions of space and time in the future. Stephan Hawking obtained his PhD degree in applied mathematics and theoretical physics, specializing in general relativity and cosmology. A real PhD I might add not one made up with crayons and pinned on your shirt like yours. He has written dozens of books and co-authored at least a half a dozen books as well. How many books have you written? Now I mean real books that have impacted the world? So if you have anything to add to the recently departed Mr Hawking that is of good moral consequence then be my guest otherwise STFU.

#171 Greg Sulkowski on 03.14.18 at 9:17 am

Thanks for the excellent post Garth.
The last paragraph says it all.

#172 James on 03.14.18 at 9:23 am

#163 Gravy Train on 03.14.18 at 8:38 am

#143 Smoking Man on 03.14.18 at 12:32 am
“Never believed a thing [Stephen Hawking] said. Too Albert Einstein fake for me.”

Wow, SM, you never cease to amaze me! You really are a dummkopf, aren’t you, Smokey? You’re so much like Trump. Just when I think you (and he) can’t possibly lower the bar any further, you both surprise me with more inanity! I used to point and laugh at Trump’s stupidity, but now I’m just sickened by his arrogance and ignorance! (And yours!)
_________________________________________
I wouldn’t worry too much, Smoking Man is a SAD SAD old broken, drunken man who hates his own life so much he has to comment about hatred to everyone else in order to make himself feel good. Thank god he is in California and never coming back to Canada. America, this old pile of $hit is yours, you can have him. I’m sure he is looking for a position in the White House as an assistant ass wiper for Trump.

#173 dharma bum on 03.14.18 at 9:24 am

#151 Jamie

“…it should be noted that there are countless corporations that have built their mission statement around capitalizing on aging boomers and the very tragic predicaments that may lie had of them. The new breed of retirement residences will ensure that they milk every penny out of these people before they die.”
——————————————————————-

Time to invest in shares of these companies NOW! I believe there are several REITs available for these corporations.

#174 James on 03.14.18 at 9:26 am

#162 maxx on 03.14.18 at 8:09 am

There is no way to mitigate the loss of loved ones. I left my job to look after a terminally ill parent and it was the most worthwhile time I ever spent.

……………………………..

The world has lost Stephen Hawking – 76 light years.
Heaven bless him.
_______________________________________
Agreed, we are all that the terminal have as a connection in this life. Had an uncle in my wife’s family dies from ALS and it was a painful way to watch someone slowly erode away.
RIP Stephan Hawking.

#175 dharma bum on 03.14.18 at 9:40 am

#78 Nonplused

I read your post all the way through.

Whoa! It was as if I was reading about MY situation word for word.

That was weird.

Makes me think that a ton of folks are in the same boat as us.

#176 ARH on 03.14.18 at 10:00 am

Maybe the brother who wrote in has the issue right but the reasons wrong. Maybe the other brother sees himself as protecting the nest egg for his mother, not himself. My husband went to the bank when his mother was entering care. He asked if he could move her GIC’s to an investment portfolio. The bank told him his mother had always had GIC’s and that it would be wrong to change her investment profile. My husband thought about that and agreed. Maybe the brother is respecting his mother’s approach to handling the best egg.

#177 d'Edmonton on 03.14.18 at 10:01 am

#54 mark on 03.13.18 at 7:18 pm

Sad. I wouldn’t say this is advice, but look into the role of carbs and sugar.

I recently got myself off them and the effect on my brain and mental clarity is astounding. It’s like I’ve been walking around in a fog previously. Not to mention my belt size went in two holes.

—————————————-
I seconds that.

We have just started the quite difficult process of eliminating carbs and sugar from our lifestyle. It’s everywhere and in all cultures. Our body’s addiction to them does not help.

Dr. David Perlmutter’s “Grain Brain – The Surprising Truth about Wheat, Carbs and Sugar — your Brain’s Silent Killers” is an awesome read.

Dr. Robert Lustig’s videos on Youtube too are a must view – could eliminate Diabetes type 2.

#178 LivinLarge on 03.14.18 at 10:10 am

Judging by a net sale price of $600K I will presume that this scenario is not transpiring in the 416.

If $8000/m of after tax income is required to care for this woman outside 416 then imagine what it costs in 416. It will never cost less than it does today so long term net income management is critical and not just starting when things deteriorate.

I know it won’t likely go down well with the blog dogs here but all of us should acutely concerned with the costa of senior care

#179 Smoking Man on 03.14.18 at 10:14 am

James and Gravey Train. Best song ever.

O say can you see, by the dawn’s early light,
What so proudly we hail’d at the twilight’s last gleaming,
Whose broad stripes and bright stars through the perilous fight
O’er the ramparts we watch’d were so gallantly streaming?
And the rocket’s red glare, the bombs bursting in air,
Gave proof through the night that our flag was still there,
O say does that star-spangled banner yet wave
O’er the land of the free and the home of the brave?

On the shore dimly seen through the mists of the deep
Where the foe’s haughty host in dread silence reposes,
What is that which the breeze, o’er the towering steep,
As it fitfully blows, half conceals, half discloses?
Now it catches the gleam of the morning’s first beam,
In full glory reflected now shines in the stream,
’Tis the star-spangled banner – O long may it wave
O’er the land of the free and the home of the brave!

And where is that band who so vauntingly swore,
That the havoc of war and the battle’s confusion
A home and a Country should leave us no more?
Their blood has wash’d out their foul footstep’s pollution.
No refuge could save the hireling and slave
From the terror of flight or the gloom of the grave,
And the star-spangled banner in triumph doth wave
O’er the land of the free and the home of the brave.

O thus be it ever when freemen shall stand
Between their lov’d home and the war’s desolation!
Blest with vict’ry and peace may the heav’n rescued land
Praise the power that hath made and preserv’d us a nation!
Then conquer we must, when our cause it is just,
And this be our motto – “In God is our trust,”
And the star-spangled banner in triumph shall wave
O’er the land of the free and the home of the brave.

Fine, but is it inclusive, conciliatory, respectful of all opinions and gender-neutral? – Garth

#180 Country Gentleman on 03.14.18 at 10:24 am

#172 James on 03.14.18 at 9:23 am
#163 Gravy Train on 03.14.18 at 8:38 am
#143 Smoking Man on 03.14.18 at 12:32 am
“Never believed a thing [Stephen Hawking] said. Too Albert Einstein fake for me.”
_________________________________________
….. Thank god he is in California and never coming back to Canada.

*****”***

“Thank God he went back to California.”
Warning: Prophetic lyrics:

https://youtu.be/bROnRfvEOog

#181 Hamilton on 03.14.18 at 10:31 am

How to get out of a deal in BC….

The Canadian Press
Published Tuesday, March 13, 2018 3:33PM PDT
VANCOUVER – The former owner of a mansion in Vancouver’s exclusive Shaughnessy neighbourhood must repay a $300,000 deposit after the sale of the property fell through because she didn’t tell the buyer about a suspected gang-related murder of her son-in-law at the front gate of the home.

In a British Columbia Supreme Court decision issued last week, Justice Paul Pearlman says the would-be purchaser of the six-bedroom, 10 bathroom mansion was the victim of a “fraudulent misrepresentation.”

Feng Yun Shao backed out of an offer to buy the 9,000-square-foot mansion in 2009, just days after she had agreed to pay about $6.1 million for the property after forwarding the deposit.

Court documents show she was told the 84-year-old owner, Mei Zhen Wang, had moved back to Guangzhou, China, and her daughter, who lived in the house, wanted to move to West Vancouver to be closer to her child’s school.

But neither Wang, her daughter Gui Ying Yuan, nor their realtor told Shao about the November 2007 unsolved slaying of Yuan’s husband, Raymond Huang, and Pearlman’s decision says the death was a factor in the decision to sell.

He has ordered Shao’s deposit be returned with interest.

Pearlman also dismissed Wang’s claim that Shao breached the contract and owes, not just the deposit, but a further $338,000 to cover the difference between Shao’s offer and the $5.5 million eventually paid by another purchaser.

Wang was living in China in 2003 when the judgment shows she forwarded funds to her daughter to buy the mansion, and then joined Yuan, Huang and their children in 2004.

The extended family was living in the home in 2007 when Huang was fatally shot by an unknown assailant.

Wang returned to China later that year but Yuan, her children and a sister continued to live at the home until June or July of 2008.

“(Yuan) maintained that she had no concerns for her safety, or the safety of her family following her husband’s death,” writes Pearlman, although he also notes that media reports linking the case to organized crime prompted the private West Point Grey Academy to request Yuan’s pre-teen daughter leave the school.

The girl was accepted at another exclusive private school in West Vancouver. Yuan bought a home there and the mansion was listed for sale in June 2008 but languished in what the court was told was a soft market, before being relisted with new agents in 2009.

Yuan told the court her husband was a businessman whose enterprises included a trucking company and a restaurant. She denied he was involved in any criminal organization.

Both Wang and Yuan testified Wang’s return to China and Yuan’s desire to be near her daughter’s school were key factors in the decision to sell, but Pearlman ruled there was more to it.

“It is entirely consistent with the probabilities of the situation that then existed, that Ms. Wang would fear for the safety of her two adult daughters and her grandchildren while they lived at the location where Raymond Huang met a violent death,” he writes.

“I find that the murder of Raymond Huang was also a reason why the plaintiff wished to sell the property.”

But Pearlman writes Yuan, on her mother’s behalf, didn’t share those concerns with her realtors so when Shao inquired about the reason for sale she was only told about proximity to the new school.

“That representation, while true on its face, was incomplete. It concealed the fact that Ms. Yuan’s daughter changed schools as a result of Mr. Huang’s death, and that the death was a factor in the plaintiff’s decision to sell the property,” writes Pearlman, noting that is one key element of fraudulent misrepresentation.

He says Shao wanted to move to Shaughnessy because she understood it was “prestigious, safe and quiet” but he says she was entitled to an “accurate answer” and “relied on the plaintiff’s representation regarding the reason for selling the property.”

Pearlman says the fraudulent representation sets aside the contract of purchase and in addition to the return of Shao’s deposit and interest, he has also awarded her some of her legal costs.

#182 NoName on 03.14.18 at 10:36 am

Interesting topic, something that I think of it daily. Biggest fear what if older one goes rouge and becomes “my half” sibling.

The way the things are now with peer pressure,”social” media, educational system that suck, automation, metoo, deplorables, legalized weed, legal system that cater to super rich, political dynastys, in my opinion future generations are (everyone below millenials) are screwed.

But on a another hand maybe its just me, maybe I just suck as a parent filosofer, so I worry to much.

I wonder what would be Allan Watts comment on my situation. Probably -take bigger life insurance…

And millenials think they have it tough, LOL.

#183 James on 03.14.18 at 10:46 am

Never underestimate how right-wing troll populism is undermining western democracy, and the forces behind it.

https://www.thestar.com/opinion/editorial_cartoon/2018/03/14/theo-moudakis-ford-and-putin.html

#184 JP Superstar on 03.14.18 at 10:49 am

#153 Flat Earth Society on 03.14.18 at 2:39 am

Chew on this you all that think you know something:

“Life is a sexually transmitted disease with a 100% mortality rate.”

See if that statement is incorrect. Provide proof.
**********

Proof of what? Plagiarism, or quoting without attribution*? In my case, I can verify that the “disease” did not harm the host, unless shame is a new disease.

*Even I include references, but it’s just the one Book.

#185 Fred on 03.14.18 at 10:51 am

It’s not your money. You earned none of it, so anticipate nothing. When a parent struggles and needs help at the end of the day, extend it freely. Spend it all on their behalf. Be selfless and giving. Treat him or her as you would wish to be treated. That is your inheritance

…………….

bravo

#186 Mark's Parents II on 03.14.18 at 10:58 am

#140 EdwardBear on 03.14.18 at 12:22 am

My best friend’s Alberta ranch raised Mom, God rest her wonderful soul, called
that ghoulish behaviour “ Waiting for dead men’s boots.”

*********
We snuck this on Mark’s playlist for the trip ;-)

Since you’ve abandoned me
My whole life has crashed
Won’t you pick the pieces up
‘Cause it feels just like I’m walking on broken glass

(Annie Lennox)

#187 Sue on 03.14.18 at 11:02 am

So sad, I have always wondered if there will be a connection to kids raised in a daycare setting as opposed to being raised by a stay at home parent, how the aging parents are treated. Many factors to consider as well as being financially able to. Just a thought. The once a man, twice a child quote got me thinking. But perhaps there is a little what come around goes around happening here. We are not perfect, there are crappy parents in both of those camps, and it easy to judge but there is probably more to some of these stories, however the one thing we must remember is at the very least, to treat others as you yourself would want to be treated. Respect, love and dignity is all that matters.

#188 Milly on 03.14.18 at 11:21 am

I am worried about this time, as my father in law has a lot of debt and no savings. We aren’t well off ourselves, what do we do when the times comes and he needs care? We can’t afford it, especially if we decide to have a family…. what will be our options when this happens?

#189 Incubus on 03.14.18 at 11:23 am

“Every month the cost of her care ($5,000) But the real problem is she now needs 24-hour supervision, for which the tab is an extra three grand.”

So it is $8000,00 a month, what kind of scam is that?

My mother is in a healthcare facility in Montreal and it cost $1600/month.

Late-stage Alzheimer’s patients often require 24-hour care and supervision in a closed facility that prevents wandering or injury. They usually have other medical conditions that require attending to, yet are often not candidates for hospitalization. It’s not just about the money. Visited your mom lately? – Garth

#190 Marshall McLuhan on 03.14.18 at 11:30 am

It seems like every year some fool writes a book on morality. The last Good Book was published 2000 years ago. Unfortunately, people have forgotten that the “message” is the message. Just read the lines, not between them. This isn’t the US Constitution for God’s sake.

“But if anyone does not provide for his own, and especially for those of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.” Timothy 5:8

Hmmm…. did he really mean to write “worse”?

#191 NoName on 03.14.18 at 11:32 am

#177 d’Edmonton on 03.14.18 at 10:01 am
#54 mark on 03.13.18 at 7:18 pm

Sad. I wouldn’t say this is advice, but look into the role of carbs and sugar.

I recently got myself off them and the effect on my brain and mental clarity is astounding. It’s like I’ve been walking around in a fog previously. Not to mention my belt size went in two holes.

—————————————-
I seconds that.

We have just started the quite difficult process of eliminating carbs and sugar from our lifestyle. It’s everywhere and in all cultures. Our body’s addiction to them does not help.

Dr. David Perlmutter’s “Grain Brain – The Surprising Truth about Wheat, Carbs and Sugar — your Brain’s Silent Killers” is an awesome read.

Dr. Robert Lustig’s videos on Youtube too are a must view – could eliminate Diabetes type 2.

Friend of mine send me this few days back. You should watch, might find it interesting.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0z03xkwFbw4

#192 IHCTD9 on 03.14.18 at 11:40 am

Great post. I’m likely going to be in this boat within 10-15 years. I love the idea of getting a professional service for handling the estate. Less risk due to the unknown. Less squabbling (our family is very prone to this – it is guaranteed to happen). Every thing gets done, and the estate pays for it.

#193 Eyestrain on 03.14.18 at 11:41 am

#179 Smoking Man on 03.14.18 at 10:14 am
James and Gravey Train. Best song ever………

Fine, but is it inclusive, conciliatory, respectful of all opinions and gender-neutral? – Garth
********

FYI. The US fight song was amended back in 2003:

“Then conquer we must, when our cause it is just,
And this be our motto – “In God is our trust,”
When unjust is our cause, all other others pay cash”

#194 young & foolish on 03.14.18 at 11:41 am

In 2017 the colour of the markets was green ….
In 2018 the colour has turned red ….

#195 Victor V on 03.14.18 at 11:55 am

#99 Smoking Man on 03.13.18 at 9:21 pm

On another note Trump appoints for the first time in history a woman to head the CIA. MSM. Dead Silence..

Dr Smoking Man
PhD Herdonomics

=========

Here’s one you’ll appreciate:

https://www.thestar.com/opinion/star-columnists/2018/03/13/instead-of-being-in-jail-haspel-is-cia-director.html

#196 Guy in Calgary on 03.14.18 at 11:59 am

Just found out step dad has stage 4B cancer last night. 53 years old, just about to sail off into the sunset.

Make sure your affairs are in order because you just never know.

#197 CBC Special Bulletin on 03.14.18 at 12:11 pm

The Royal Canadian Navy have made an Order requesting all owners of self-propelled pleasure craft between 20′ and 100′ in length to send all particulars to the RCN within 14 days from today if they have not already been offered or requisitioned.

Let’s bring our medics home!

(Operation Dynamo Hum: Top Secret)

#198 G, Oakville on 03.14.18 at 12:17 pm

Hi Garth,

It’s always good to be reminded that,
‘It’s not your money’.
and that you understand the concept of
‘Duty of care’.

Might anyone out there have an idea of how to check if persons (running for public office) also understand the concept of “duty of care” (before we vote)?

I have come to the conclusion that not all people do understand the concept of “duty of care”.
I could speculate as to why they don’t seem to, but I’d guess they would just come up with they own circular reasoning to justify there actions or inactions.

Some might find it interesting to search for
“the-nerotoxins-that-threaten-our-brains” and wonder what effect it has on our society and individuals.
I’ve heard the circular reasoning ‘there is no economic disadvantage’ more than once.

BTW, I’ve seen inside some “old age homes’ and it’s not all uplifting. My wife has expressed that she would rather never have to go to one. Unfortunately the odds have been increasing over time that more persons will need that kind of help. So why are animal studies ignored or dismissed regarding neurotoxic chemicals?
That’s right, ‘there are no economic disadvantages’.

Anyway, Happy Pi Day You-All.

#199 Ford's Autonomous Vehicle on 03.14.18 at 12:25 pm

“Under pressure from U.S. regulators, Ford is recalling nearly 1.4 million midsize cars in North America because the steering wheels can detach from the steering column and drivers could lose control.”

“Under pressure”????

https://www.ctvnews.ca/business/ford-recalls-almost-1-4m-cars-steering-wheel-can-come-loose-1.3842327

#200 LivinLarge on 03.14.18 at 12:27 pm

“Maybe the brother is respecting his mother’s approach to handling the best egg.”…and maybe the [email protected] didn’t want to lose their commission on the GIC roll over or maybe “ancient aliens” actually did exist…”maybe” a lot of things.

MANY preboomers like treasuries. They like the perception of “safety” and no capital loss. Unless this unfortunate woman was a skilled financial planner then she might very well fit into that generational thing where “my husband handled all financial decisions” and he liked GICs

When did bad investment planning become an unalienable right? If this woman is indeed totally naive about financial planning then what ever her investment “style” is it’s really immaterial. She needs $8000 per month net and that figure is going to go up every year in the future. Simply drawing down capital as Fearless Leader suggested will almost certainly extend the time she will be able to live comfortably on existing assets.

On a related note, me thinks the time has come for each of us to lobby our elected reps to raise the OAS clawback threshold dramatically or eliminate it entirely. If a single person outside TO requires $96,000 net income just to have a reasonably comfortable and safe final years then current OAS clawback rules have no connection to current reality.

While we’re on it, let’s also lobby our reps to repeal the 2016 changes to the taxation of trusts. For ages, trusts to take care of the financial uncertainties of final years planning were taxed like an individual taxpayer and could employ things like the dividend tax credit but the 2014 budget changed all of that starting in 2016. Now the income retained in a trust and then distributed to the beneficiary is taxed at the maximum marginal rate for the province the beneficiary lives in (like 53.5% in Ontario) regardless of the quantum of that income. So the elderly benficiary is actually taxed like they earned over $200K when they weren’t even close.

This draconian change to the tax treatment of trusts disproportionately impacts seniors and especially those who were retired and widowed prior to 2014. I don’t recall if the Fed Cons were behind this grievous tax grab but the timing suggests they were so let’s get T2 to roll back that PC move.

#201 Damifino on 03.14.18 at 12:37 pm

#192 IHCTD9

I love the idea of getting a professional service for handling the estate.
——————————

I did. My estate will be handled by a long established trust company. And yes, they will take a small bite. I’ve seen how family dysfunction poisons the disposition of assets… it will be worth every cent.

#202 Incubus on 03.14.18 at 12:40 pm

“Visited your mom lately? – Garth”

Yes, every week, but she is not in this condition.
She has stage 5 of alzheimer and in good health.

$8000 a month is a scam.

What happen if you have no money?

#203 Alistair McLaughlin on 03.14.18 at 12:46 pm

#23 IM in C writes:
And now the contrarian view:
If you do not protect your inheritance, you can be very sure someone else will be getting it !!

The day you wake up thinking about protecting your inheritance is the day someone else deserves to get it.

#204 JP Superstarman on 03.14.18 at 12:46 pm

I see those poor misguided Young Americans are prolonging their “revolution” against guns. They won’t know a revolution from an insurrection until they are old enough to ship off to some remote battleground where “Steele” is the only truth.

Freud might have opined that today’s “Columbine Kids” are simply resolving the conflicts between the Id (desire) and the Ego (reality) vs their mortality. Somewhat in contrast, today’s archetypal politicians are suppressing the superego (morality), thus allowing the Id to dominate the Ego.

Here in Canada, the Ford Nation adheres to more of a Nietzschean philosophy. The superego lies latent or undeveloped. The oddity is that Ford lacks the requisite seductive charms; it seems that his supporters simply willed him to power. In short: if he didn’t exist, he would have been invented.

It takes a man (and a woman) to create a child, and a village to nurture that child. It takes only one man-child to royally muck things up. A masculine “toxic-shock syndrome”, if you will.

#205 Newcomer on 03.14.18 at 12:47 pm

Finally, kids, expect zero. No legacy, no windfall.
——

I have actually always planned for the opposite. It’s normal for kids to plan to support parents if they need it. They supported us when we needed it.

Inheritance is not a force for good in society. There are times when it is necessary, such as when a child has special needs, and times when it makes sense, such as passing along a family business, but a level field makes for better neighbors.

#206 Heloguy on 03.14.18 at 12:49 pm

CBD and THC. New information about these compounds is being discovered everyday. Don’t let your prejudices about marijuana stop you and yours from living a better life. I know I sound like an ad for weed, but I have seen firsthand the curative properties of this plant, from curing skin cancer on a seniors hand to a lady named Heather who was told to go home and make peace with her god because she had 8 weeks to live. This was last february. Her husband refused to let his wife die and looked for a hail mary pass. High THC RSO was used and Heather’s white cell count is now a a point where doctors don’t even want to see her anymore. She is in complete remission. I personally know how it works for pain and with the symptoms of PTSD.

https://www.alzheimers.net/6-15-15-effects-of-medical-marijuana-on-alzheimers/

http://phoenixtears.ca/faq-about-rso/

#207 Midnights on 03.14.18 at 12:50 pm

For times like this Garth, this book is needed for people.
A must read….
I Love You Forever
https://www.amazon.ca/Love-You-Forever-Robert-Munsch/dp/0920668372/ref=nodl_

#208 JRH on 03.14.18 at 12:53 pm

Thanks Garth for the excellent advice….Jim

#209 LivinLarge on 03.14.18 at 1:03 pm

“$8000 a month is a scam.

What happen if you have no money?”…simple, you get the care option that’s behind door #2. And you don’t want that level of care for your self.

The elderly in Canada may rarely be put out on the street but the bottom level of nursing home care provided under provincial maximum fee structure is only a small step up from the street.

It’s not a scam, it’s capitalism at its finest. Expensive land, expensive buildings, expensive staff ad finitum. If your bungalow is worth a million then a 1 bedroom seniors apartment with meals etc is worth $3-5K per month.

#210 Alistair McLaughlin on 03.14.18 at 1:17 pm

@139 Jane24, great post.

Macleans ran an article in the early 90s talking about the multi-billion dollar windfall about to land on the boomers, and how that windfall would alter the economic landscape. Less than a decade later, they had to print a mea culpa of sorts, in which they referred to the earlier article and admitted they got it completely wrong. The amount actually inherited was estimated at less than half their original prediction.

Besides healthcare, one of the major drains on inheritances was lengthy litigation. Many of the biggest inheritances ended up going to the lawyers as the beneficiaries fought vicious wars of attrition over the ever-decreasing estate. This disproportionately affected the biggest inheritances most of all, which drove the entire national total way down. The bigger the inheritance, the more likely it is that the beneficiaries (and wannabe beneficiaries) will fight over it.

My faith in human nature is never high. It falls to zero when I read things like that. No wonder so many of us have pets. They’re the only beings one can ever truly trust.

#211 Lost...but not leased on 03.14.18 at 1:34 pm

Learning empathy early…

My future spouse had her grandmother(her Moms mother) living with them (old school ). Unfortunately, she had a stroke and had to be taken care of in seniors home, luckily not far away.

Every weekend, we would go and pick her up and bring her back for a visit back home . This included putting her in a wheelchair and lifting/pulling her up to the 2nd floor. She passed away at age 82.

We were barely in our 20’s at the time…but a valuable experience via care and empathy learned at an early age. (As it stands, my mother -in law is the only one left..she lives alone…still mobile..but she is wearing down).

My empathy extends to those who never had such experiences early in life and are suddenly cast in positions of responsibility later in life.

#212 Mark. on 03.14.18 at 1:34 pm

#170 James on 03.14.18 at 9:16 am
So if you have anything to add to the recently departed Mr Hawking that is of good moral consequence then be my guest otherwise STFU.
*********

Do you have any idea of how much Time and money it cost keep him in Briefs ?

#213 Newcomer on 03.14.18 at 1:38 pm

#77 akashic record on 03.13.18 at 8:01 pm
——-

How about considering what you would do if you had no siblings and no inheritance because your father spent the money on luxuries. How much would you budget for your father’s care in that case? Now budget that amount and forget that any siblings are involved. Getting to fair is hard, getting to reasonable is easier.

#214 Newcomer on 03.14.18 at 1:40 pm

Sorry, I meant to rely to:
#78 Nonplused on 03.13.18 at 8:02 pm

#215 SoggyShorts on 03.14.18 at 1:49 pm

#145 Flat Earth Society on 03.14.18 at 12:55 am
The renewable energy debate is a bit like managing finances, isn’t it?
Fossil fuels are currently cheap and easy, but in the long run not a great idea.
Spending your whole paycheck every month is also easy, but in the long run probably not a great idea.

A bit more focus on savings and a bit more focus on renewable energy might be prudent.

Just because we can’t replace 100% of fossil fuels overnight doesn’t mean we shouldn’t start.

#216 bdwy sktrn on 03.14.18 at 1:58 pm

#48 Smoking Man on 03.13.18 at 7:11 pm
Been there done that. I’ll drive a rental car off a cliff before I put my kids through that shit.
———————–
no way i’d put my kid thru that either.

just had an uncle (perfectly healthy, 75) drop dead from a heart attack. he was a full time caregiver for his wife , who is far along the a-disease path. their kids are in a bit of a pickle now.

personally i know i have the heart genetics – all i have to do is keep smoking cigs and eating pizza and i figure i’m guaranteed to go without much fuss!

#217 Joe Bloggs on 03.14.18 at 2:01 pm

Re: James and Gravey Train
– LOL!!! Birds of feather they say… SJW and public employee. And now they bring Putin – nice company.

#218 John Dough on 03.14.18 at 2:08 pm

#200 LivinLarge on 03.14.18 at 12:27 pm
On a related note, me thinks the time has come for each of us to lobby our elected reps to raise the OAS clawback threshold dramatically or eliminate it entirely.
While we’re on it, let’s also lobby our reps to repeal the 2016 changes to the taxation of trusts. For ages, trusts to take care of the financial uncertainties of final years planning were taxed like an individual taxpayer and could employ things like the dividend tax credit but the 2014 budget changed all of that starting in 2016. Now the income retained in a trust and then distributed to the beneficiary is taxed at the maximum marginal rate for the province the beneficiary lives in (like 53.5% in Ontario) regardless of the quantum of that income. So the elderly benficiary is actually taxed like they earned over $200K when they weren’t even close.
*********
This is just the kind of information one gleans from this blog that makes it all worthwhile.

Your first point regarding OAS I interpret as “If I can’t get any OAS then don’t give it to anybody else.” Is that a fair assessment?

Not being a “Trust ” expert I can only guess that the 2016 changes stopped allowing the descendants of a dead person to pretend they are still alive for tax purposes. Grief is hard, but 99% of us are able to grab the tax-free inheritance and struggle on.

#219 Linda on 03.14.18 at 2:11 pm

Comments on public vs. private LTC facilities. First, the line to get into public facilities is longer than the number of spaces available. The majority of LTC/extended care beds in hospitals are filled with patients awaiting placement. Second, if the person has money those funds go towards their costs, usually up to a capped limit depending on province. Those w/o assets in the next bed are at tax payer expense. The main difference between public & private facilities is choice of where to go. Public might be less expensive, but your loved one could end up literal hours from where they live because that is the first space to come available. When my mother was being considered for placement the choice offered was North Bay (she lived near Ottawa, Ontario). The proffered facility was literally a 3+ hour drive (one way) from where she lived. Fortunately she died before she was sent into isolation from family & friends.

Health is wealth, folks. Do what you can to ensure that you can ‘age in place’ because this LTC/nursing home option is not what I’d call ‘quality of life’ living.

#220 Lost...but not leased on 03.14.18 at 2:20 pm

We updated our “will” several months back.

Notary suggested we do POA at same time. I had assumed POA was un-necessary, that by default one spouse had legal powers over other. WRONG !

It is very important to designate someone as POA,ie for example if the home has to be sold if one spouse gets sick or injured…POA must be in place.

Re Executors…I hear what Garth is saying…but in our circle we don’t know anyone that has gone the outsider route. We appointed 2 family members who are also beneficiaries.

Updating the will is also important so that one is tuned into any/all changes in laws, etc.

#221 Stan Brooks on 03.14.18 at 2:21 pm

#191 NoName on 03.14.18 at 11:32 am

Great info.

However how many can afford healthy diet these days, considering the prices of fruits and veggies?

Carbs ans sugars, especially HFCS is everything a house poor person can afford.

It seems you can draw direct connection between policies, especially monetary policies and diet and it seems between diet and Alzheimer, Dementia, cancer, diabetes type II.

I am sure it won’t stop BoC from sleeping well at night.

#222 a.a. Meetings on 03.14.18 at 2:46 pm

#204 JP Superstarman on 03.14.18 at 12:46 pm
Here in Canada, the Ford Nation adheres to more of a Nietzschean philosophy……
*&*&*&*^

I got no clue what that Commie spiel even means . All I knows is Dougie takes the bus like the rest of us. We’re Ford Nation – we don’t need a Big Wheel to drive this economy !

#223 IHCTD9 on 03.14.18 at 2:48 pm

#78 Nonplused on 03.13.18 at 8:02 pm

Anyway there is an important parenting lesson in all of this. If you give one child a dollar because they need it, you have to give all of your children a dollar even if they don’t need it.
____________________________________

True story:

One day I came home from work and there was a cheque sitting on the table for several thousand dollars made out to my wife, with my FIL’s name on it.

Turns out that two pairs of Sis/Bro in-laws had borrowed an identical sum each from the parents in law. Years went by with no re payment, and they eventually decided to forgive the debt to the kids in question – and carry on.

The cheque sitting on our table was “compensation” for this series of events. No we did not need it. Any suggestion that they keep it was rebuffed.

I guess my in-laws must be credited with good foresight.

#224 Big Kahuna on 03.14.18 at 3:37 pm

With all this talk of dementia prevention not a word spoken about Booze-which has been known for decades to have the strongest link to dementia.

#225 Lost...but not leased on 03.14.18 at 3:39 pm

#219 Linda

Re Private versus Public facilities.

My late mother was in (2) different facilities ..both private.

Her rooms were basically a bed…a closet..a dresser and night table..her TV from home and a bathroom. Roughly 8 ft by 20 ft room. Very spartan.

Costs were $6500 +month

Public facilities ??? from what I have seen no private rooms..one is doubled up with another..or 4 to a room.

Difference…IMHO not much really. They get up for meals..hopefully some activities..sit around a common area…have supper…go to bed..repeat. Public facilities may actually be better re staff, as private facilities are profit driven and I had suspicions that some staff, given their ages, were fresh out of school or TFW.

I would highly recommend people visit various homes..they are NOT all the same…so one is prepared when the time comes. One should get a pretty good idea if the elderly are being cared for or simply warehoused.

#226 SoggyShorts on 03.14.18 at 3:41 pm

#221 Stan Brooks on 03.14.18 at 2:21 pm
#191 NoName on 03.14.18 at 11:32 am
Great info.
However how many can afford healthy diet these days, considering the prices of fruits and veggies?

**************************
Animal protein including dairy gives you cancer, carbs give you diabetes….
Not much left of that food pyramid we learned about in school except nuts, fruit and veggies.
Not great for people living in a country with such a short growing season.

#227 Big Kahuna on 03.14.18 at 3:47 pm

#209-Many Europeans have their elderly in seniors residences in Thailand, Philippines, etc. where $4000/month provides care that is impossible to get in NA or Europe.

#228 HAPPY BIRTHDAY, GARTH on 03.14.18 at 3:56 pm

I hope you are having a wonderful day ..!!

Maybe go wild with two scotches tonight, Garth. And some cake and ice cream from the General Store profits later on perhaps .. just a little?

Whatever, enjoy. It is YOUR day ..!!

A terrific post, too, on a topic rarely discussed.

My wife and I purchased LTCi (long-term care insurance) years ago, as a part of us wanting the “choices” that financial independence hopefully brings.

For choice is just as, or more, important in our later years .. to avoid becoming victim to a crowded, underfunded, and overburdened health care system.

There already exists in Ont (my experience), an alarming shortage of beds accommodating a rapidly growing number of elderly, attempting to fill them.

If you’ve ever tried to help get a parent or a relative into a good facility in reasonably close proximity to you, you’ll understand what I’m saying.

I’m sure they do their best, but it is often an ugly, long, and uncertain process, in a time of great fear and much anxiety for your loved one.

So that ‘planning ahead’ is a wise and worry-less move. Get on this one, folks ..

#229 James on 03.14.18 at 3:59 pm

#195 Victor V on 03.14.18 at 11:55 am

#99 Smoking Man on 03.13.18 at 9:21 pm
On another note Trump appoints for the first time in history a woman to head the CIA. MSM. Dead Silence..
Dr Smoking Man
PhD Herdonomics

=========

Here’s one you’ll appreciate:

https://www.thestar.com/opinion/star-columnists/2018/03/13/instead-of-being-in-jail-haspel-is-cia-director.html
________________________________________
Don’t bother he doesn’t read details just glances the conspiracy theory pages. What is that I hear? Oh its dead silence, Smoky is emulating a typical Trumpian mental attitude.

#230 James on 03.14.18 at 4:03 pm

#212 Mark. on 03.14.18 at 1:34 pm

#170 James on 03.14.18 at 9:16 am
So if you have anything to add to the recently departed Mr Hawking that is of good moral consequence then be my guest otherwise STFU.
*********

Do you have any idea of how much Time and money it cost keep him in Briefs ?
______________________________________
It think his book residuals and personal appearances paid for those ten fold. Hawking had amassed a great fortune through his lifetime – leaving behind about $20million (£14.3million).

His fortune will have come from various sources of income.

Hawking was the director of research at the Centre for Theoretical Cosmology at the University of Cambridge.

According to CelebrityLifeCycle his salary was estimated to be around $3million (£2.15million).

The late physicist was also a best-selling author who wrote and co-authored many books.

His Sunday Times’ best-selling book, A Brief History of Time, was translated into 35 languages and sold over 10 million copies in 20 years.

In 2012 he won the Fundamental Physics Prize – and prize money of a whopping $3million (£2.15million).

The “brightest star of modern science” won numerous awards throughout his lifetime, including the Albert Einstein Award (1978).

#231 jess on 03.14.18 at 5:07 pm

larry kudlow replaces cohn ?

===========
mucky
https://www.propublica.org/article/what-we-found-in-trump-administration-drained-swamp-hundreds-of-ex-lobbyists-and-washington-dc-insiders

#232 Dude on 03.14.18 at 5:17 pm

Well said Garth.

Thoughtful and deeply caring.

Thanks.

#233 Danforth on 03.14.18 at 5:42 pm

Happy Birthday, Garth!

#234 gary smith on 03.14.18 at 5:55 pm

This is a post with some genuinely useful reminders about aging and kindness.

Some of us are lucky enough to have parents around into our adult lives- to share moments with, enjoy grandkids, etc. I find as I age into my 30s, I am a lot more forgiving and understanding of what I saw as transgressions during my childhood, poor parenting, lack of overall guidance and emotional turmoil in our family.

Nothing is black and white- they had their struggles, did their best to put a roof over our heads and put food in our mouths and pay for our first degrees.

That being said, let’s not let the rose-colored reverence discount reality.

I suppose me and my siblings could have done without; the near daily arguing between my parents (and subsequent holes in the walls), my father’s emotional and physical absence in my childhood; the “I’m leaving” speech. And into my 20s, I’ve learned his misogynistic, paternalistic attitude towards woman (my mother, and also my wife- not the same people) and daily drinking are also things which I don’t appreciate, as I navigate the person I am trying to be. Also, their complete denial of advice for making a will and/or POA or discussing advance directives is wonderful!

I’ve forgiven it all- we are all human (for now, until the AI and robotics catch up).

Anyways- treat others how you want to be treated.

#235 Pulp Faction on 03.15.18 at 8:10 am

That’s a great article, Garth. I appreciate your candor and I’m sorry for your loss.

I’m scared of what money can do to some people. I’ve seen some real nastiness.

#236 Gravy Train on 03.15.18 at 11:17 am

#217 Joe Bloggs on 03.14.18 at 2:01 pm
“Re: James and Gravy Train
– LOL!!! Birds of feather they say… SJW and public employee. And now they bring Putin – nice company.”

I am neither an SJW nor a public employee, but just out of curiosity was your remark a compliment or an insult? :)

Oh, and I didn’t bring in Putin: Trump did! :(

#237 Interesting Stuff on the Web: Volume 22 - Pursuing Retirement on 03.16.18 at 5:05 am

[…] Duty of Care/ Greater Fool “Mom is 83, has the dreaded A-disease and stays in the ‘memory care’ wing of a retirement home in the burbs. “It’s tough to visit her now,” Nolan told me. “Not much there.” […]